Bruce Willis bounces ceremonial first pitch in Philly

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Bruce Willis, famous for such films as “Color of Night,” “Hart’s War,” and “Lucky Number Slevin,” — movies I cite because I am not gonna bend over backwards to make “Die Hard” and “Moonlighting” puns like everyone else writing about this — was in Philadelphia last night to throw out the first pitch before the Brewers-Phillies game.

The connection: Willis grew up in South Jersey and was a Phillies fan as a kid. He also once used his super strength to save some kidnapped children from a sadistic janitor while wearing a hooded rain poncho somewhere in the Philadelphia area.

The first pitch: not too great, as the man famous for singing the “🎶Seagram’s . . .GOLDEN wine coooler . . . it’s wet and it’s dry . . . MY, MY, MY, MY🎶” song in those commercials that some of us of a certain age remember, bounced it in the dirt:

Eh, it happens.

After the game someone actually asked manager Gabe Kapler if “Die Hard” was a Christmas movie:

“I maintain, not a Christmas movie,” Kapler said during a lively debate with beat writers in his office. “Aren’t most Christmas movies centered around the celebration of Christmas in some way or another?”

Um, Gabe? Do you not remember this part?

Who among us has not had a less festive celebration of Christmas with our families than that?

Oh hey, look what I found:

You’re welcome.

Rockies, Trevor Story agree on two-year, $27.5 million contract

Trevor Story
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ESPN’s Jeff Passan reports that the Rockies and shortstop Trevor Story have come to terms on a two-year, $27.5 million deal, buying out his two remaining years of arbitration eligibility.

Story, 27, and the Rockies did not agree on a salary before the deadline earlier this month. Story filed for $11.5 million while the team countered at $10.75 million. The average annual value of this deal — $13.75 million — puts him a little bit ahead this year and likely a little bit behind next year.

This past season in Colorado, Story hit .294/.363/.554 with 35 home runs, 85 RBI, 111 runs scored, and 23 stolen bases over 656 trips to the plate. He also continued to rank among the game’s best defensive shortstops. Per FanGraphs, Story’s 10.9 Wins Above Replacement over the last two seasons is fifth-best among shortstops (min. 1,000 PA) behind Alex Bregman, Francisco Lindor, Xander Bogaerts, and Marcus Semien.

With third baseman Nolan Arenado likely on his way out via trade, one wonders if the same fate awaits Story at some point over the next two seasons.