There is not much more idiotic and reductive than lumping tens of millions of people who happened to be born during an arbitrary span of years into some cartoonish generational stereotype.
Or, not. I dunno. Maybe my opinion on this is just too cynical, lazy and disaffected. I am a Gen-Xer after all. Whatever, man.
Either way, turn your attention to the latest attention-seeking minor league promotion. It’s from the Montgomery Biscuits of the Double-A Southern League. They’re holding “Millennial Night” next Saturday. Here’s how they’re teasing it:
No word on when they’ll have “Baby Boomer Night.” That’s when fans born between 1946 and 1964 get in super cheap, are taught that they’re entitled to everything and are allowed to wreck the damn place. When the game is over they invite the Millennials in — charging them ten times as much — and make the Millennials pay for cleaning up while yelling at them about how ungrateful and lazy they are. It’s a wild scene.
My guess: this is a fake promotion, designed to drum up social media and internet outrage, to which I suppose I’m contributing. But (a) if it gets more people out to a ballgame, cool; and (b) if the backlash jokes it inspires makes even one Baby Boomer realize how thoroughly they’ve turned their back on their youthful ideals and have ruined the world for subsequent generations, it’s all worth it.
Former Red Sox right-hander Nathan Eovaldi is up for grabs this offseason, and Nick Cafardo of the Boston Globe says that as many as nine suitors are interested in bringing the righty aboard. While the Red Sox are eager to retain Eovaldi’s services after his lights-out performance during their recent postseason run, they’ll have to contend with the Brewers, Phillies, Braves, White Sox, Padres, Blue Jays, Giants, and Angels — all of whom are reportedly positioned to offer something for the starter this winter.
It wasn’t all smooth sailing for the 28-year-old in 2018, however. After losing his 2017 season to Tommy John surgery, he underwent an additional procedure to remove loose bodies from his right elbow in March and didn’t make his first appearance until the end of May. He was flipped for lefty reliever Jalen Beeks just prior to the trade deadline and finished his season with a combined 6-7 record in 21 starts, a 3.81 ERA, 1.6 BB/9, and 8.2 SO/9 through 111 innings.
Despite his numerous health issues over the last few years, Eovaldi raised his stock in October after becoming a major contributor during the Red Sox’ championship run. He contributed two quality starts in the ALDS and ALCS and returned in Games 1-3 of the World Series with three lights-out performances in relief — including a six-inning effort in the 18-inning marathon that was Game 3.
A frontrunner has yet to emerge for the righty this offseason, but Cafardo points out that the nine teams listed so far might just be the tip of the iceberg. Still, he won’t be the most sought-after starter on the market, as former Diamondbacks southpaw Patrick Corbin is expected to command an even bigger payday following his career-best 6.0-fWAR performance in 2018.