Rays Double-A team to hold ‘Millennial Night’ next Saturday

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There is not much more idiotic and reductive than lumping tens of millions of people who happened to be born during an arbitrary span of years into some cartoonish generational stereotype.

Or, not. I dunno. Maybe my opinion on this is just too cynical, lazy and disaffected. I am a Gen-Xer after all. Whatever, man.

Either way, turn your attention to the latest attention-seeking minor league promotion. It’s from the Montgomery Biscuits of the Double-A Southern League. They’re holding “Millennial Night” next Saturday. Here’s how they’re teasing it:

No word on when they’ll have “Baby Boomer Night.” That’s when fans born between 1946 and 1964 get in super cheap, are taught that they’re entitled to everything and are allowed to wreck the damn place. When the game is over they invite the Millennials in — charging them ten times as much — and make the Millennials pay for cleaning up while yelling at them about how ungrateful and lazy they are. It’s a wild scene.

My guess: this is a fake promotion, designed to drum up social media and internet outrage, to which I suppose I’m contributing. But (a) if it gets more people out to a ballgame, cool; and (b) if the backlash jokes it inspires makes even one Baby Boomer realize how thoroughly they’ve turned their back on their youthful ideals and have ruined the world for subsequent generations, it’s all worth it.