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Marlins yell at “Marlins Man” after one of his “Mermaids” flashed her cleavage on camera

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You know Marlins Man, right? He’s the guy — real name Laurence Levy — who got D-level famous a few years back for showing up at playoff and World Series games is primo behind-home-plate seats while wearing orange Marlins gear despite those games not involving the Marlins.

He has milked his “fame” to a pretty decent degree. If you happen to be at the high-profile games he attends, you’ll note that he gets interviewed by the media and a line of fans forms to see him and have their picture taken with him. I talked to him for 30 seconds at the World Series a couple of years ago. He’s kind of obnoxious. What anyone sees in him apart from “huh, he gets good seats” is beyond me, but then again there’s a lot I don’t understand about America these days so maybe I’m the problem.

Anyway, back at his home turf, Marlins Park, he has taken to having young women in tight t-shirts sitting next to him. He calls them “Marlins Man’s Mermaids.” The other night, as the Marlins played the Cardinals, one of them decided to pull the front of her shirt down in an effort to distract Brett Cecil with her, um, décolletage:

No word as to what Cecil thought of it, but the Marlins didn’t much appreciate it. From the New York Post:

“I didn’t know what happened,” Levy told The Post over the phone Thursday. “When I came back, people were like, ‘Did you hear what happened?’ Then the Marlins sent me a text message, ‘You need to keep you girls under control, they cannot be flashing on TV it’s not appropriate. Bringing them is one thing to have fun, but the actions aren’t good for the image and we can’t condone it.’”

For what it’s worth the Mermaid in question claims she had no idea that she’d be on TV:

“To be honest, I was caught off guard. I was sitting and watching the game and we had a couple guys on base and we were just kind of talking and laughing and we thought it’d be kind of a funny distraction to get the pitcher’s attention and see if it would help, so that’s kind of what we did,” Korinna said. “But we didn’t think we were on camera.”

That’s very hard to believe, as anyone who has ever seen a baseball game knows that the people behind home plate are on TV all the time. She must think we’re a bunch of boobs.

In any event, this will all be Derek Jeter and Jeb Bush’s problem soon, so I hope they’re keeping abreast of these developments.

Indians designate Carlos Gonzalez for assignment

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The Indians have designated outfielder Carlos Gonzalez for assignment. This comes after Gonzalez batted a mere .210/.282/.276 over 117 plate appearances in Cleveland. That came after he had to settle for a minor league contract with the Indians in mid-March.

A few years ago Gonzalez was a superstar, winning three Gold Gloves, two Silver Slugger Awards, making the All-Star team three times and coming in third in the MVP balloting once upon a time. That was then, however. His most recent good season came in 2016, when he hit .298/.350/.505 with 25 homers and drove in 100. In 2017 and 2018 he combined to hit .232/.269/.334. Between his falloff in production and the fact that his big numbers of the past were heavily supported by playing at Coors Field, it should not be shocking that he couldn’t make it work in Cleveland.

If he wants to continue his career, he’ll no doubt have to take a minor league gig someplace. Otherwise, this could be the end of the line.