Wanna buy a profane David Ortiz ugly Christmas sweater?

Associated Press
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I’m not sure what hipster came up with the ugly Christmas sweater craze, but he and his waxed mustache have a lot to answer for. Sure, I’m guessing it was pretty funny to see at the first holiday party he wore it to, but he had to know that the idea would be mainstreamed and commercialized eventually.

I mean, look at this stuff. Your aunt and grandma were probably unironically wearing stuff like this AS they were ironically buying stuff like this. Culturally, we have crawled up our own rear ends.

But at least some folks are making somewhat creative ugly Christmas sweaters. And are using the proceeds for charitable causes as opposed to enriching Kohl’s stockholders. People like David Ortiz and Teespring, who have come out with this beauty, the proceeds of which will benefit the David Ortiz Children’s Fund:

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They’re $34, too. Which is appropriate given the man on the shirt.

Brian Cashman signs 4-year contract to remain Yankees GM

Lucas Peltier-USA TODAY Sports
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SAN DIEGO — Brian Cashman has signed a four-year contract to remain the New York Yankees Senior Vice President and General Manager. The announcement was made during the first day of baseball’s Winter Meetings.

Cashman, New York’s GM since 1998, had been working on a handshake agreement since early November, when his five-year contract expired.

The Yankees were swept by four games in the AL Championship Series and haven’t reached the World Series since winning in 2009. It is the franchise’s longest title drought since an 18-year gap between 1978-96.

Cashman’s main goal during the offseason is trying to re-sign AL MVP Aaron Judge.

Judge hit an American League-record 62 homers this season with a .311 batting average and 131 RBIs. He turned down the Yankees’ offer on the eve of opening day of a seven-year contract that would have paid $213.5 million from 2023-29.

While Judge remains on the market, Cashman was able to re-sign Anthony Rizzo on Nov. 15 to a two-year contract worth $40 million after turning down a $16 million player option.

Cashman has been the Yankees general manager since 1998. He has been with the organization since 1986, when he was a 19-year old intern in the scouting department. In his 25 seasons as GM, the Yankees have reached the postseason 21 times, including four World Series championships and six American League titles.