Here are the scores. Here are the highlights:
Dodgers 8, Nationals 4: Chase Utley hit a leadoff homer and drove in three on three hits. Scott Kazmir gave up one run and four hits in seven innings, striking out eight. He’s 6-0 in his last 12 starts. The last time Clayton Kershaw pitched for the Dodgers the club lost and they fell to eight games back of the Giants. Since then they’re 12-6 and are 4.5 games back. Baseball is a team sport, you guys.
Marlins 2, Phillies 1: Christian Yelich homered and drove in the game-winning run with a single in the 10th inning. He’s been on fire since making a mysterious tweet about someone making a defamatory video that someone tried to claim depicted him doing . . . something, but which was not him. I’m still stuck on the notion that someone, somewhere in this country considered Yelich, a nice player but by no means a super celebrity, the reasonable target for a faked, well, whatever video.
Blue Jays 5, Diamondbacks 1: Edwin Encarnacion hit a three-run homer. He’s hit nine homers in seven career games at Chase Field. After the game he suggested it was maybe the batter’s eye at that park. Who knows. As Crash Davis said, “if you believe you’re playing well because you’re getting laid, or because you’re not getting laid, or because you wear women’s underwear, then you *are*! And you should know that!” But I guess a nice batter’s eye is good too. Aaron Sanchez won. He’s 9-0 in his last 15 starts. Maybe he’s wearing women’s underwear.
Rays 10, Rockies 1: Blake Snell pitched well and Even Longoria drove in three as the Rays routed the Rockies. In other news, am I the only person who ever sits and wonders how they’d explain the modern world to time travelers who suddenly appeared at their door? Like, say, suddenly Thomas Jefferson — and for me it’s always been Thomas Jefferson for some reason — were to just show up and it was my job to explain to him air travel and world events like the Civl War and Wourld War II and everything that had happened in the past 200 years or so? Sometimes it’s in a baseball context and the person would be Cap Anson or someone and I’d have to explain that, yeah, we have teams in Denver and St. Petersburg, Florida now. I guess if it was Anson I’d also have to explain why we allow non-whites to play. He’d probably get super mad about it too, but I suppose if Jefferson had to deal with the end of slavery — THAT was a tense imaginary conversation, brother — Anson could grow the hell up too. Man, I’ve gone on about this long enough now to where I sure hope I’m not the only one who has had super lame daydreams about historically significant time-travelers. That would be rather nerdy and embarrassing. So, um, if I am the only one, know that I am TOTALLY joking about that and it never, ever happened. Yeah.
Pirates 3, Brewers 2: Josh Harrison hit a walkoff homer. Well, it was actually a triple and an error which allowed him to score, but every kid in America who is unfamiliar with official scoring would call it a homer. We’re so hung up on rules and stuff, man. Free your mind, sheeple. In other news Pirates pitcher Jameson Taillon took a 105 m.p.h. line drive to the head and somehow was allowed to stay in the game. That seems . . . responsible and stuff.
Mets 2, Cubs 1: Rene Rivera drove in the tiebreaking run with two outs in the top of the ninth and then Jeurys Familia escaped a bases-loaded, nobody out jam in the ninth to save it. The late drama eclipsed nice starts from Jake Arrieta (7 IP, 5 H, 1 ER, 8K) and Noah Syndergaard (5.2 IP, 7 H, 0 ER, 8K).
Red Sox 4, Giants 0: David Ortiz hit a three-run homer and Brock Holt — BROCK HOLT! — hit a solo shot. The Giants have lost four straight to start the second half. After the game Bruce Bochy said “We just need somebody to get a big hit and inject some life into this offense.” Yet this same man is not allowing Madison Bumgarner to hit for himself in this weekend’s series against the Yankees. Physician, heal thyself.
Twins 6, Tigers 2: Tommy Milone shut out the Tigers for eight innings before running out of gas in the ninth. Still, not too shabby for a pitcher no often accused of being not too shabby. Eduardo Nunez was named the Twins Heart and Hustle Award winner yesterday morning and drove in three yesterday evening. Not a bad day for him.
Braves 5, Reds 4: The Braves led 4-2 entering the bottom of the ninth, the Reds rallied for two to force extras but then Ender Inciarte hit a sac fly for the go-ahead run in the 11th. Tyrell Jenkins allowed two runs on four hits in six innings in his second big league start. That’s somethin’ I guess.
Indians 7, Royals 3: Danny Salazar held the Royals to three runs — two earned — in six and two-thirds and struck out seven. The Tribe’s 3-4-5 hitters, Francisco Lindor, Mike Napoli and Carlos Santana, drove in two runs a piece. Cleveland maintains a 6.5 lead over the Tigers and an eight game lead over the Royals in the Central.
Angels 8, Rangers 6: Two three-run homers for Albert Pujols. That’s pretty good, huh? Both came off of former teammate Kyle Lohse, who is 0-2 and has allowed 13 runs in 9.1 innings pitched so far. That’s pretty bad, huh? Both of these guys debuted in 2001. I feel like only one of them will be playing past 2016. In other news, Texas reliever Tony Barnette hit Pujols in the head with a 92 mph pitch in the seventh inning. It was an accident — Barnette apologized profusely on the field — and Pujols is OK, but I’m sure some old school jackass somewhere thinks Pujols deserved it for hitting a couple of bombs.
Athletics 4, Astros 3: Marcus Semien won the A’s Heart and Hustle Award yesterday morning. Then he scored the game-winning run from second base on an infield single. That’s . . . something we probably need to see:
More like the Heart and Hustle and Reddick Hit Away From The Shift and Correa’s Throw Was Offline Award, but that’s pretty spiffy all the same.
White Sox 6, Mariners 1: Melky Cabrera hit a tie-breaking homer leading off the seventh inning and Todd Frazier added a two-run shot in the ninth as the White Sox snapped a five-game losing streak. Brett Lawrie hit a solo homer too. Jose Quintana allowed one run over six innings. That creep can roll, man.
Padres vs. Cardinals — POSTPONED: I wish, I hope, I wonder
Where you’re at sometimes
Is your back against the wall?
Or just across the line
Have you been standing in the rain
Reciting nursery rhymes?
Trying to recall
Some long lost kind of peace of mind
Peace of mind
Try spending the night sometime
All alone in a frozen room
Afterneath you’ve lain
Your Saddle in the rain