Babe Ruth on the $1 bill!


It’s a slow news day in baseball and all anyone is talking about online is how Harriet Tubman is going to replace Andrew Jackson on the $20 bill.

Which, by the way, is a good call. Jackson is celebrated as a general and an all-around tough guy and Americans have always liked that kind of thing in our presidents, but objectively speaking he was bad. He led a ruthless effort to push American Indians off their land in the eastern United States¬†in order to open southern land for white farmers and real estate speculators, himself included, and it led to the death and displacement of an untold number of Indians. He was also hostile to a central bank and paper currency in general, and his polices in that regard led to the Panic of 1837. Why THAT guy should be on paper money is a really dang good question, so, we’re going to get Harriet Tubman, a true hero, and it’s hard to argue with that.

Which makes me wonder, in the interests of both boredom and content creation, which baseball figures should be on which bills. Which will totally happen when I’m elected president. My stab:

  • $1 Babe Ruth;
  • $5 Willie Mays;
  • $10 Walter Johnson;
  • $20 Hank Aaron;
  • $50 Earl Weaver;
  • $100 Jackie Robinson

Not a TON of thought went into these and they’re not meant to be direct analogies to the figures currently on the bills. I personally think Willie Mays is the greatest ever and that Lincoln was the greatest president, so sure. Babe Ruth would just look good on a greenback. Walter Johnson is a little bit of affirmative action for pitchers and Weaver is for managers. I’m totally open to other suggestions there, I just like them both. Aaron has to be someplace. There’s an argument that Jackie should be on a lower denomination so more people could have Jackie Bucks, but the phrase “all about the Robinsons” just flows, right? Hi, I’m old.

Anyway: mindless stuff for a boring Wednesday. Yell at me about it in the comments.