A 108-year-old woman is going to throw out the first pitch at Saturday’s Mariners game

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Bob Dutton of the Tacoma News-Tribune reports that a 108-year-old woman, Evelyn Jones, will throw out the first pitch at Saturday’s Mariners-Angels game.

When she does, Jones will become the oldest person to ever throw out a ceremonial first pitch. The previous record holder was 105-year-old Agnes McKee, who did it last July in San Diego.

Jones was born in 1907. Here’s what else happened in 1907:

  • The first Cubist art exhibition took place in Paris;
  • Oklahoma became the 46th state;
  • The Lusitania made its maiden voyage;
  • John Wayne was born. John Wayne has been dead for 36 years; and finally and most amazingly,
  • The Cubs actually won a World Seres!

How does one get to be 108-years-old? From Dutton’s story:

Jones credits her longevity to a diet of beef and lots of vegetables, exercise, and drinking alcohol only at Saturday dances.

I really hope I live to be 108 and someone asks me that question. Instead of the real answer for all super old people — good genetics and good luck — I’m going to list a series of vices and the ingestion of copious harmful substances and say that that, my friends, is how I got here!

Then I’m going to turn my attention to one of the world’s greatest mysteries.