The 2015 season has been a nightmare for the Phillies. They began a home series against the Cardinals at Citizens Bank Park on Friday night with baseball’s worst record at 23-45 and baseball’s worst run differential by a mile at -112.
How could things possibly get worse for them? Base Ba’al frowned upon the city of Philadelphia and foisted upon the Phillies’ dugout a squirrel, which ascended the netting behind home plate and tried to literally walk a tightrope, but fell onto the dugout. It then scampered inside, causing various Phillies to shriek and scatter in fear.
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To make matters worse, they lost Friday night’s game 12-4 to the Cardinals. Starter Phillippe Aumont walked seven batters and threw 103 pitches in four innings of work in his first major league start. He had pitched for the Phillies in parts of the three previous seasons, but as a reliever.