What post should we put up when the world ends?


It’s an excruciatingly slow day. Sure, we could dissect more Hall of Fame idiocy, but I’m not really feeling that at the moment. At the moment I’m preoccupied by the End of the World.

This preoccupation is the result of this fantastic post I just read over at Jalopnik, which reveals the long-rumored and finally revealed video that CNN created back in the day for the sole purpose of being the last thing broadcast before the world ended. Really. I mean, it was Ted Turner running the show then, and if you know anything about Ted Turner back when he had his fastball, this is no surprise. But it’s still really something.

Which makes me wonder what will be the last post HBT runs just before humanity ceases to be.

If Drew is working it’ll probably be something about how some marginal Cardinals prospect is absolutely RAKING in 30 plate appearances in the Venezuelan winter league, but what if one of the rest of is working?

If an asteroid takes out North America while Joe Mauer is vacationing in Australia, will Gleeman have time to write a post about how, at least until the tidal wave hits the eastern hemisphere, Mauer is the best living catcher? Will Matthew explain to us how this apocalypse is really not as big a deal as everyone thinks it is? Will D.J. lament that, with this, the Mets will NEVER get a shortstop? If it doesn’t happen after 6pm on a Friday, Saturday or Sunday, will Bill even know about it? Will I have time to viciously criticize the takes of newspaper writers tweeting about how they love their families and hope there is a God?

I have no idea! The end could happen fast. Which is why I have set up a fail safe. If the End Times come and no one has time to get up a proper post, WordPress will immediately post this:


If there is any time after that, we’ll try to get a few substantive posts up.

Orioles sign OF Aaron Hicks, put Cedric Mullins on 10-day IL with groin strain

Tommy Gilligan-USA TODAY Sports

BALTIMORE — The Baltimore Orioles signed outfielder Aaron Hicks less than 24 hours after Cedric Mullins went down with a strained right groin.

Mullins went on the 10-day injured list, but the Orioles are hoping Hicks can help defensively in the spacious outfield at Camden Yards. Hicks was released last week by the New York Yankees with more than 2 1/2 seasons left on his contract.

“We had noticed that he was a free agent even before the injury,” Orioles general manager Mike Elias said. “When the injury occurred and it became pretty clear this was going to be an IL, it seemed like a good fit even more so at that time.”

The Orioles are responsible for paying Hicks just $483,871, a prorated share of the $720,000 minimum salary. The Yankees owe him the rest of his $10.5 million salary this year, plus $9.5 million in each of the next two seasons and a $1 million buyout of a 2026 team option.

The 33-year-old Hicks hit just .188 in 28 games for the Yankees this year.

“We have stuff that we look at from a scouting and evaluation perspective,” Elias said. “It’s very different from just looking at the back of a baseball card, and we hope that we get a bounceback from anyone we bring here.”

Hicks batted .216 last season.

“Hopefully that’s a good thing for him,” Yankees manager Aaron Boone said of the Baltimore deal. “A lot of time here and a lot of good things happened for him here. I know the last couple of years have been a struggle. But hopefully it’s a good opportunity for him and certainly wish him well. Not too well being in our division and a team we’re chasing, but hopefully it’s a really good fit for him.”

Mullins left a loss to Cleveland after he pulled up while running out an infield grounder. Outfielder Colton Cowser – the fifth pick in the draft two years ago – is hitting .331 at Triple-A Norfolk, but he went on the IL in the past couple weeks.

“Certainly he was building a case towards promotion consideration prior to his injury and prior to Cedric’s injury,” Elias said. “We’ll just see where we’re at.”

Hicks was active for the game but not in the starting lineup. Austin Hays, normally Baltimore’s left field, was in Mullins’ usual spot in center.

When the wall in left at Camden Yards was pushed significantly back before last season, it made left field a bigger challenge defensively.

“In this park … you really need two center fielders,” manager Brandon Hyde said. “Aaron’s got a lot of center-field experience. Played left field here before also. Brings the defensive aspect and then the switch-hitting.”