Baseball is dying, you guys

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As we observed last week, it’s not enough to note that the World Cup is getting great ratings and is generating a lot of passion and excitement. Or that, generally, soccer continues to grow in the United States. We must turn it into a zero-sum game and observe all of this in the context of baseball’s long-discussed demise (note: the discussion began in the 19th century).

The latest to provide a eulogy — or, technically speaking, a terminal diagnosis: Frank Fitzpatrick of the Philly Inquirer:

Baseball’s been a lifelong companion. But the old game is looking a little frail, and I worry about its future.

I can’t easily express any specific concerns. The worries my gut sense haven’t yet reached my head.

Something doesn’t feel right.

It’s like that moment we first noticed our parents’ mortality. Maybe it was nothing more than an incongruous comment, a faraway look in their eyes, or an uncertain step, but whatever it was, we instinctively knew nothing would ever be the same again.

Of course, all of that is leadup to a discussion of the World Cup. Which while it is wrongheaded and insulting about baseball, manages to insult the World Cup as well by not discussing it on its own terms as opposed to in terms of baseball’s alleged demise.

Then again, the author refers to a game involving “the Florida Marlins” from just last week, so maybe we’re not dealing with a guy who knows a whole hell of a lot about anything.