Now it can be told: Matt Cain sliced his finger cutting a sandwich into “fancy triangles”

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Giants right-hander Matt Cain was placed on the disabled list after cutting his finger while trying to make a sandwich in the team clubhouse.

That’s an injury that lends itself to a lot of ribbing from teammates, fans, and even media members, so Cain felt the need to clarify that … well, he does know how to make a sandwich without slicing his hand open. He just struggles with the whole post-sandwich making routine, apparently.

Via Hank Schulman of the San Francisco Chronicle:

Cain wants it known that he had finished the ham-and-cheese sandwich and grabbed the knife so he could cut it. “I went to cut it, to make it fancy in triangles,” he said. When he dropped the knife he tried to catch it, and now he is on the DL for the second time in his career.

Who among us hasn’t been hurt by our sandwich vanity? It’s a tale as old as time. I once tried to cut the crust off a turkey sandwich and ended up murdering a family of six. Also, pro tip: In general, don’t try to catch knives.