All the Mets are sick and Daniel Murphy is missing Opening Day because his wife is in labor

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Mets second baseman Daniel Murphy won’t be in the Opening Day lineup because his wife went into labor with their first child, Adam Rubin of ESPN New York reports. Murphy played all but one game last season, logging 697 plate appearances to rank sixth in the league. (Also: Congrats!)

And because these things always seem to happen to the Mets and there’s no sense in wasting any time continuing that for 2014, manager Terry Collins told Rubin that 4-5 players are “fighting the flu.”

Outfielder Chris Young is apparently one of them, because the Mets’ official Twitter account just announced that he’ll sit out Opening Day due to sickness, although previously Collins indicated that Young also has a quadriceps injury that would keep him from playing.

Ichiro wore a fake mustache to sneak into the Mariners’ dugout

Associated Press
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Ichiro Suzuki is now a Mariners employee and, as such, he’s not allowed to sit in the dugout during a game. That’s for coaches and players only.

He knows that, too. Indeed, on the day Ichiro announced his sorta-retirement, he talked about how it was going to be hard not to be down on the field with the other players. He even made a ridiculous joke about how, “[he] can’t say for certain that maybe [he] won’t put on a beard and glasses and be like Bobby Valentine and be in the dugout.”

In related news, this mysterious stranger was seen by an Associated Press photographer in the Mariners dugout during the first couple of innings of the M’s-Yankees game:

(AP Photo/Bill Kostroun)

No beard, but I guess that joke was not very ridiculous after all. Either way, by the end of the second inning — poof — he was gone.

Obviously, when something interesting like this happens you mustache an expert for their opinion on the matter. To that end, the Associated Press reached Bobby Valentine, who famously did the same thing after an ejection way back in 1999, for comment:

“He was perfect. I never would have known it was him.”

Valentine was suspended for two games and fined $5,000. I’m assuming Ichiro won’t get hit quite as hard given that he wasn’t defying an umpire’s authority, but even if he does have to pay a fine, he’ll likely do so willingly.