Grant Balfour’s truck is absolutely ridiculous

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Yo dawg, I heard you liked to compensate, so we gave you a big giant truck with two levels of running boards and a big neon sign that says “I’m compensating for something” on the side. Except the sign is on back order and won’t be in until next week!

 

I’m not reflexively anti-truck or SUV. They have their uses. People who have to haul things or drive through snow or rough terrain. People with big families. Heck, I understand even if it’s just a matter of you wanting to sit up high and feel like a big guy once in a while. It’s bad for gas, but there are way worse offenses against humanity than that. Live and let live.

But seriously, what kind of a person other than a total jackwagon drives a truck like this? The guy works in Florida, hauls a bag with a mitt in it at most and probably drives there by himself. Go get something more modest, Grant. Like an EM-50 Urban Assault Vehicle.

Brewers promote David Stearns from GM to president of baseball operations

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It used to be that the top dog in a team’s baseball operations department was the general manager. That has changed over the past several years with some combination of title inflation, a genuine addition of supervisory layers and, on some level, employe poaching insurance leading to the top dog now being called, usually, a “president of baseball operations.”

Brewers’ general manager David Stearns is the latest to assume that tile, as the club just announced that he has been promoted to Milwaukee’s president of baseball operations. He has also received a contract extension of unknown length.

Not a big shock given how well the Brewers did in 2018, winning the NL Central title and playing in the NLCS. It’s also worth noting — with a nod to that “employee poaching insurance” item above — that Stearns has drawn some interest from other organizations. It’s thus not unfair to see the promotion is both a thanks for a job well done and a means of keeping other teams’ hands off of him, as employees are generally not given permission to interview for lateral moves, but are given permission to interview for promotions.

The Mudville Nine may have wanted to steal him from Milwaukee, but for Stearns to get a promotion from where he is now would require the creation of some other lofty title.