We’ve reached a low point in the contrived St. Louis-Los Angeles culture war

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Are there differences between the Dodgers and the Cardinals? Sure. We’ve noted the little on-the-field dustups and have talked a lot about the whole “Best Fans in Baseball” thing.  It’s been an amusing aside.

But even if you’re critical of the Cardinals, you must admit that the notion that St. Louis represents some higher plane of dignified and respectful baseball (and that any reasonable people in St. Louis actually think this) is a silly caricature. Yes, there are examples of people who think that way, but they’re outliers I assume. It’s mostly a straw man used to beat up on Cardinals Nation. It’s not a different brand or class of baseball in St. Louis. It’s not a different brand or class of fan. They’re like everyone else.

But I’ll be damned if some people aren’t still trying to push that narrative. To the point of couching it as something akin to a culture war. As an example I give you today’s column from Bob Nightengale of USA Today. In which he talks to Stan Musial’s grandson and both of them seem to agree that St. Louis Cardinals baseball is all that separates dignified society from invading hordes:

This isn’t just about flying another pennant in their stadium – their fourth in 10 years – or having the opportunity to win their 12th World Series championship. It’s about the responsibility of upholding tradition. It’s for old-time baseball.

What follows is a bunch of quotes from Musial’s grandson about how the game ought to be played and was played back when men were men and all of that.  Stan Musial’s grandson is 32 years-old, by the way. What an expert on tradition and old-time baseball.

But what’s even sillier are the examples Nightengale trots out to cast Cardinals baseball in a more dignified light:

They’d like to know if everything, even the crowd noise, have to be fake in Southern California. Do fans really have to be instructed when to scream as if they’re a game-show audience? Can’t anything on the scoreboard be shown besides fans acting crazy, dance contests, and kiss cams?

Yeah, none of that in St. Louis:

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I’ll grant that, I’m told anyway, that the Cardinals don’t do much of the “LET’S MAKE SOME NOISE!” stuff. Which is a good thing.  But they clearly are not different or above most other parks when it comes to fun stuff. It isn’t just stark videos of Bob Gibson threatening people to behave lest he put a pitch in their ear.

Again, none of this is to criticize Cardinals fans. They’re like anyone else. And like anyone else, they have some people in their ranks that make you want to roll your eyes.  But for the most part they’re just baseball fans.

But the media narrative of a Dodgers-Cardinals culture war is beyond played out by now, to the point where it is becoming both ridiculous and, with this column, totally counterfactual. Enough already.

Royals outfielder Gordon to retire after 14 seasons

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Kansas City Royals outfielder Alex Gordon, the former first-round pick whose rollercoaster career took him from near bust to All-Star and Gold Glove winner, announced Thursday he will retire after the season.

Gordon was the second overall pick in the 2005 first-year player draft following a standout career at Nebraska, where he won the Golden Spikes Award as the best amateur in baseball. He made his big league debut two years later and, after a few years shuttling back and forth to the minors, moved from third base to the outfield and finally found success.

He wound up playing his entire 14-year career in Kansas City, joining only George Brett and Frank White as position players with that much longevity with the franchise. He heads into a weekend four-game series against Detroit with the third-most walks (682), fourth-most homers (190), fifth-most doubles (357) and sixth-most games played (1,749) in club history.

The three-time All-Star also holds the dubious distinction of being the Royals’ career leader in getting hit by pitches.

While he never quite hit with the kind of average the Royals hoped he would, Gordon did through sheer grit turn himself into one of the best defensive players in the game. He is the only outfielder to earn seven Gold Gloves in a nine-year span, a number that trails only White’s eight for the most in franchise history, and there are enough replays of him crashing into the outfield wall at Kauffman Stadium or throwing out a runner at the plate to run for hours.

Gordon won the first of three defensive player of the year awards in 2014, when he helped Kansas City return to the World Series for the first time since its 1985 championship. The Royals wound up losing to the Giants in a seven-game thriller, but they returned to the Fall Classic the following year and beat the Mets in five games to win the World Series.

It was during the 2015 that Gordon hit one of the iconic homers in Royals history. His tying shot off Mets closer Jeurys Familia in Game 1 forced extra innings, and the Royals won in 14 to set the tone for the rest of the World Series.

Gordon signed a one-year contract to return this season, and he never considered opting out when the coronavirus pandemic caused spring training to be halted and forced Major League Baseball to play a dramatically reduced 60-game schedule.

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