Shocker: Yunel Escobar does something kinda jerky

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I know it’s hard to believe that a guy who alienated his entire clubhouse in Atlanta and then made headlines buy putting homophobic slurs on his eyeblack in Toronto did something douchey, but in this case it actually happened.

Yunel Escobar, ladies and gents, playing Jedi master to Jordany Valdespin’s padawan, strutting after a home run when he had gone 0-for-3 on the day and had a throwing error in a game his team was losing:

Tampa Bay Rays manager Joe Maddon said during spring training that he anticipated a time when he would have to call SS Yunel Escobar into his office to discuss some on-field behavior. That time has arrived.

Maddon wasn’t pleased with the way Escobar made the safe sign as he stepped on home plate while completing his two-run, ninth-inning home run during Monday’s 7-5 loss to the Blue Jays.

Escobar’s defense was that he does that every time he hits a home run.

Well, my son used a diaper every time he had to take a dump until he was potty trained. He eventually figured out that he shouldn’t do that forever because to do so reflected on his maturity level.

Chris Paddack loses no-hit bid in eighth inning vs. Marlins

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Update (9:16 PM ET): Aaaaaand it’s over. Just like that. Starlin Castro led off the eighth inning with a solo home run to left field. That ends the shutout bid as well, obviously.

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Padres starter Chris Paddack has kept the Marlins hitless through seven innings on Wednesday evening in Miami. The right-hander has allowed two base runners on a throwing error and a walk while striking out seven on 82 pitches.

The Padres’ offense provided Paddack with three runs of support, all coming in the fourth on Greg Garcia‘s RBI single and a two-run home run by Austin Hedges.

Paddack, 23, entered Wednesday’s start carrying a 2.84 ERA with an 87/18 K/BB ratio across 82 1/3 innings in his rookie campaign.

Among all 30 teams, the Padres are the only one without a no-hitter. They came into the league in 1969. The Marlins were last victims of a no-hitter on September 28, 2014 when Jordan Zimmermann — then with the Nationals — accomplished the feat.