Major League Baseball asks the Miami New Times for its Biogenesis records

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A little over a week ago 33% of the words in the headline would make so sense to any of us. Anyway:

Major League Baseball officials have asked the Miami News Times for records the alternative newspaper obtained for a story on alleged use of banned substances by several players. Miami New Times editor Chuck Strouse said Tuesday the paper had not yet decided how to respond. Strouse described the MLB move as a request and noted that the league does not have legal subpoena power.

Bud: Wait, we don’t have any subpoena power? Manfred! Torre! Get in here!

Rob Manfred and Joe Torre: [in unison] Yes boss?

Bud: This fella from the newspaper said I don’t have subpoena power. How is that possible?

Manfred: Because you’re not the government, sir.

Bud: I have control of a monopoly, do I not?

Torre: Yes sir.

Bud: And I have had federal agents do my bidding in the past, have I not?

Manfred: Yes sir.

Bud: Then get me one of those subpoena things and let’s get cracking, OK? [presses button on desk, pneumatic tube descends upon him, he is sucked into another room, possibly for lunch]

Manfred: [sigh]. Joe, get George Mitchell over here. Tell him to wear his governmenty suit.

Report: Padres have made offers to both Manny Machado and Bryce Harper

Manny Machado
Kevork Djansezian/Getty Images
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Jon Heyman has been hot on the free agent trail today, reporting that the Padres have made offers both Manny Machado and Bryce Harper. The offer to Machado is believed to be for eight years and about $250 million, while the offer to Harper is believed to be for more than that.

Heyman was reporting on Harper earlier, tweeting that the Phillies are the favorite to sign him. He added this evening that Harper has multiple long-term offers at more than $30 million annually. Regarding Machado, Heyman noted that while Machado was believed to have had a preference for the East coast, he will go for the best deal now, which puts the Padres firmly in the picture.

The Padres reportedly met with Machado last week. A late entrant into the sweepstakes, the club has shown the willingness to spend, signing Eric Hosmer to an eight-year, $144 million contract last year. If he goes to San Diego, Machado would be the full-time third baseman with Luis Urias handling shortstop.

Nothing appears close, but we’ll take anything resembling a spark to light the hot stove.