The Yankees are apparently junior high schoolers now

43 Comments

Sometimes I think that covering the Yankees is like covering junior high school. Except even junior high school news can be more substantive than “She called him! Did he ever call her back?!!”

Kevin Youkilis never had a problem letting Joba Chamberlain know how he felt on the field, but he’s giving him the silent treatment now. Chamberlain — who had a longtime feud with Youkilis while the third baseman was on the Red Sox — said the new Yankee never returned the voicemail the pitcher left him after Youkilis signed with the Bombers in December. Is it lingering bad blood or just bad cell phone service? We probably won’t know until the new teammates — or is it frenemies? — actually talk to each other.

Further reports indicate that Chamberlain’s best friend’s sister’s boyfriend’s brother’s girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who’s going with the girl who saw Youkilis pass out at 31 Flavors last night. I guess it’s pretty serious.

In other news, the Yankees need to sign someone or make a trade or something because I think their beat writers are going a bit loopy.

Astros clinch postseason berth with 11-3 win over Angels

Astros
Getty Images
Leave a comment

No surprise here: The Astros are headed back to the postseason to defend their title following a landslide 11-3 win over the Angels on Friday. This figures to be their third playoff run since 2015, though they have yet to wrap up the AL West with a division title.

First baseman Yuli Gurriel led the charge on Friday, smashing a grand slam in the first inning and tacking on a two-run homer in the second and RBI single in the fifth to help the Astros to a seven-run lead. The Angels eventually returned fire, first with Mike Trout‘s 418-foot homer in the sixth, then with an RBI hit from Francisco Arcia in the seventh, but they couldn’t close the gap in time to overtake the Astros.

On the mound, right-hander Gerrit Cole clinched his 15th win of the year after holding the Angels to seven innings of three-run, 12-strikeout ball. His sixth strikeout of the night — delivered on an 83.1-MPH knuckle curveball to Kaleb Cowart — also marked the 1,000th strikeout of his career to date. He was backed by flawless performances by lefty reliever Tony Sipp and rookie right-hander Dean Deetz, both of whom turned in scoreless innings as the offense barreled toward an 11-3 finish with Jake Marisnick‘s sac bunt and George Springer‘s three-run shot in the eighth.

Despite having qualified for the playoffs, the Astros still carry a magic number of 6 as they look to clinch a third straight division title. They’re currently up against the Athletics, who entered Friday’s contest against the Twins just four games back of first place in the AL West.