Brennan: reign in the post-clinching booze-blasts

55 Comments

We see a lot of beer and champagne celebrations after teams clinch, well, everything. When I’m feeling particularly grumpy and humorless I tend to think that maybe teams should save such celebrations until they win the pennant at the very least because, really, these things are getting a bit rote and scripted and isn’t one celebration enough?

When I’m not feeling grumpy, however — and that’s most of the time — I realize that these are grown men who can and should be able to do whatever the hell they want. And in no instance is my objection to them going to be some sort of puritanical “this is all too much alcohol and debauchery” thing. Unlike Buzz Killington here:

The stunning excess exhibited in these celebrations is perhaps the biggest problem of all. This isn’t a matter of just popping a cork or two or 10; this is an all-out, binged-up, beer and champagne blast. It would be one thing if it were being done in private, but it’s not. It’s there for all of us to see, and it will repeat itself over and over again in the coming weeks.

That was actually Christine Brennan of USA Today, who could not be reached for comment because she was off thinking of the children someplace. Mostly Bryce Harper, who she mentions a lot in this story even though it seemed like the Nationals and Harper took great pains to not have the underage kid drink. Fair enough, though. You don’t want scenes of teenagers boozing it up.

Beyond that, however, I’d personally rather see these team-sanctioned booze blasts than to have them curtailed, which encourages the players to go out on the town to party.  Because if it’s official, you have to imagine that the team is making sure the players all have sober rides home. And as far as I can recall, we’ve never had a DUI incident after one of these clinching blow-outs.  Do it off-site and you’re inviting chaos.

Orioles re-sign Jace Peterson

Getty Images
1 Comment

Because baseball teams have to have 25 guys — and because someone has to be that 25h guy — the Orioles have re-signed utilityman Jace Peterson. It’s a minor league contract so he may not be the actual 25th man but, c’mon, he’s gonna be the 25th man. Let’s get real here.

Peterson hit .195/.308/.325 in 200 at-bats for the Orioles last season. That’s not good, but he can play multiple positions in the infield and outfield. He can’t play them particularly well, but you know that thing Casey Stengel said about how catchers are important because without them there are a lot of passed balls? Same goes for third base and stuff. Again: Orioles.

I was going to add that he was the only player in MLB history named “Jace,” but Jace Fry exists, so he doesn’t even have that distinction anymore, and that’s kind of a bummer.

Happy Thanksgiving.