Great Moments in Metaphors: Bobby Valentine crashes his bike while texting Dustin Pedroia

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And with this, I think Bobby Valentine’s season in Hell is complete:

In the final days of one of the most painful seasons of his career, Red Sox Manager Bobby Valentine on Tuesday lay entangled with his bicycle at the bottom of a ditch next to the Central Park Reservoir.  On the wet, slippery path, Valentine was reading a text on his phone from Dustin Pedroia, the Red Sox second baseman, and riding his bicycle. When he looked up, he had to swerve to avoid the umbrellas of two French tourists walking in front of him. The bike skidded, and he lost his balance and went careening head over pedals down the side of the hill by the road.

The only way that’s better is if he’s riding a tandem bike with Pedroia, Pedroia intentionally swerves at a curb, and Valentine winds up literally under a bus.