“Lip Sweaters”

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I think that’s the real takeaway here. That Dan Hayes of CSNChicago.com — or his headline writer if it wasn’t him — used the term “lip sweater” to describe a mustache. And that’s even more gross than “soup strainer.”

In any event, Adam Dunn and Paul Konerko had mustaches they were growing as some sort of motivational/tribute thing, decided to get rid of them at some point, but then couldn’t because they went on a winning streak. And as everyone knows, a player on a streak has to respect the streak. The Donkey knows this:

“My mustache was getting horrible,” Dunn said. “I wanted to cut it a few days ago, but we were winning games. I went as long as I could. I couldn’t even look myself in the mirror. It was bad. Can you imagine if we cut it and went in the tank? People would blame the ‘stache.”

Now we have, er, pretty Adam Dunn back.

Marlins unveil what they’re putting in the space where the home run sculpture used to be

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Not long after the new ownership group bought the Miami Marlins, face of the franchise Derek Jeter made it clear that he wanted the home runs sculpture beyond the outfield fence gone. In October they announced that it would, in fact, be moving out to a plaza or the parking lot or someplace you’re unlikely to ever see it because who goes to Marlins games?

Today we got a tease of what the Marlins are doing with the space the sculpture is vacating:

It was only a matter of time before that green wall went away. There are a lot of things I like about the overall aesthetic of Marlins Park, but almost all of them are because of their novelty. Jeff Loria was bad for a lot of reasons, but one of the few good things he did was eschew nostalgia and traditionalism with the ballpark. Nostalgia and traditionalism, unfortunately, is the straw that stirs baseball’s drink, so any “weird” colors or flourishes were gonna be beat out of that place as the years went on. It was inevitable.

As for the “three-tier social space,” here’s hoping that tickets for it are cheap or the Marlins start winning ballgames soon, because the Marlins can’t really fill their existing spectator spaces now.