Someone get Chipper Jones his medication

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Chipper Jones just got his Twitter account a couple of days ago.  He probably never would have gotten one, but someone created a well-followed fake one in recent days, and someone with MLB or the Braves convinced Jones to make an official one so people would know the difference between his and the fake.

It was not expected that he’d actually tweet too much because (a) Chipper Jones is kinda old; and (b) he strikes everyone as the kind of guy who doesn’t have much use for technology more advanced than a rifle scope.

But he has been tweeting a bit lately. And the results are … interesting:

Uh, what?

Nope. I’m more speechless than anything, thanks.

But as a big fan of yours, Chipper, a Braves fan in general and a man well-aware of how hard it is to not look silly as he approaches 40,  I ask that you please hit .400 for the rest of the season and win the World Series while operating under radio silence. You may then retire, take over as Braves manager for Fredi Gonzalez and institute a no-tweeting policy for all of your players.

Thanks!

Report: White Sox acquire Yonder Alonso from Indians

Yonder Alonso
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The White Sox have reportedly picked up first baseman Yonder Alonso from the Indians, according to Stadium. The return for Alonso is expected to be nothing more flashy than a “fringe prospect,” though the minutiae of the deal is still pending a formal announcement from both teams.

Alonso, 31, inked a two-year deal with the Indians during the 2017 offseason. His first campaign with the club yielded a modest .250/.317/.421 batting line, 23 home runs, .738 OPS and 0.7 fWAR in 574 PA. The real boon for the White Sox may not be a passable veteran bat, however, but something more intangible — like Alonso’s clout with his brother-in-law and highly-coveted free agent slugger, Manny Machado.

While Alonso’s 2018 output represented a significant decline from the career-best numbers he posted in 2017, he’s still a solid contributor at the plate and, more importantly, slated to remain under team control for the next two years with just $8 million owed in 2019 and a $9 million option in 2020. As MLB.com’s Anthony Castrovince notes, the $17 million the Indians just erased from their payroll should give them enough room to accommodate the contracts for right-handers Trevor Bauer and Corey Kluber — a bonus regardless of what they happen to get in the trade.