Chipper Jones just got his Twitter account a couple of days ago. He probably never would have gotten one, but someone created a well-followed fake one in recent days, and someone with MLB or the Braves convinced Jones to make an official one so people would know the difference between his and the fake.
It was not expected that he’d actually tweet too much because (a) Chipper Jones is kinda old; and (b) he strikes everyone as the kind of guy who doesn’t have much use for technology more advanced than a rifle scope.
But he has been tweeting a bit lately. And the results are … interesting:
Mike b and jhey go yicketty! The roadrunner went mammo! And the Bravos have a winning road trip. My kind of day off, no action!!!
— Chipper Jones (@RealCJ10) July 25, 2012
yicketty means homer! mammo means big bomb. roadrunner is francisco. any other questions?
— Chipper Jones (@RealCJ10) July 26, 2012
Nope. I’m more speechless than anything, thanks.
But as a big fan of yours, Chipper, a Braves fan in general and a man well-aware of how hard it is to not look silly as he approaches 40, I ask that you please hit .400 for the rest of the season and win the World Series while operating under radio silence. You may then retire, take over as Braves manager for Fredi Gonzalez and institute a no-tweeting policy for all of your players.