Royals (finally) designate Jonathan Sanchez for assignment

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UPDATE: Mercifully, the Royals have designated Sanchez for assignment.

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As if watching Melky Cabrera win All-Star game MVP while hitting .350 for the Giants wasn’t bad enough for Royals fans, now they’re being forced to watch Jonathan Sanchez implode every fifth game.

Sanchez, who was acquired from the Giants for Cabrera this offseason, has been the worst starting pitcher in baseball this year. Or at least the worst among starters who haven’t already been demoted from the rotation.

Sanchez’s latest clunker came last night, as he failed to make it out of the second inning against the weak-hitting Mariners while allowing seven runs. He’s now 1-6 with a 7.76 ERA in 12 starts, with more walks (44) than strikeouts (36) and 109 total baserunners in 53 innings.

That includes 23 runs in 17 innings over his last four starts, during which time opponents have hit .355 with a .462 on-base percentage and .658 slugging percentage off Sanchez. And yet as Bob Dutton of the Kansas City Star writes, dumping Sanchez from the rotation still isn’t a sure thing for the Royals.

Tom Brady’s bid to trademark ‘Tom Terrific’ rejected

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Remember back in June when New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady attempted to trademark “Tom Terrific?” And how everyone laughed at him because anyone who knows the first thing about sports knows that Tom Seaver, not Brady, was the first — and, frankly, only — “Tom Terrific?”

Well, our laughing was validated because his application was rejected by the Patent and Trademark Office because of a “false connection” with Tom Seaver. That’s the report from trademark lawyer Josh Gerben, who analyzes Brady’s failed bid here:

Next up on Great Moments in Hubris, I presume, will be my often ridiculous alma mater. But for now:

Sit down, son.