Sounds like someone put Icy-Hot in Stephen Strasburg’s jock

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No, that’s not some metaphor. Mark Zuckerman of CSNWashington.com tweets from Davey Johnson’s postgame presser:

Strasburg had one of his worst outings ever against the Padres, allowing four runs on seven hits in four innings in a 6-1 loss.  If, indeed, someone put this foul, combustible stuff in something that later touched his bits and pieces, well, it’s all understood. And all forgiven.

And of course, it would also mean that Strasburg has an almost 100% certainty of having a new nickname.

But this raises more questions than it gives answers. Who would perpetrate such a heinous act? Why prank The Franchise on a day he’s pitching?  And, dear lord, why is Davey Johnson sharing this with reporters?

UPDATE: Forgot about this. Maybe he did it to himself and he just wants to be like Roger Clemens. Both of them were in Washington, D.C. today. Maybe Rocket was giving the young, um, fireballer a little professional advice!

UPDATE II:  Turns out it wasn’t Icy-Hot!  Adam Kilgore of the Washington Post reports that it was actually an ointment called “Hot Stuff.”  Tomorrow, Kilgore’s editors at the post will give him Bob Woodward’s old office and Carl Bernstein’s old typewriter in honor of his tenacious investigative reporting of this matter.

UPDATE III:  I suppose we’re obligated to call Strasburg a “fireballer” now, huh?

Report: Red Sox sign Kenley Jansen to 2-year, $32 million deal

Dale Zanine-USA TODAY Sports
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SAN DIEGO — Veteran closer Kenley Jansen and the Boston Red Sox have agreed to a two-year, $32 million deal, a person familiar with the deal told The Associated Press.

The person spoke to the AP on condition of anonymity because the agreement was pending a physical.

The 35-year-old Jansen went 5-2 with a 3.38 ERA in 64 innings for Atlanta this year. The three-time All-Star led the National League with 41 saves, helping the Braves win the NL East title.

Boston is looking to bounce back after it finished last in the AL East this season with a 78-84 record. The Red Sox went 92-70 in 2021 and lost to Houston in the AL Championship Series.

Jansen spent his first 12 seasons with the Los Angeles Dodgers, winning a World Series title in 2020. The right-hander signed a $16 million, one-year contract with Atlanta in March.

Jansen has a 2.46 career ERA. He was an All-Star in 2016-2018.

His 391 career saves are the second-most among active players (behind Craig Kimbrel‘s 394) and eighth all time.