As a matter of law, the Twins are the White Sox’ arch rivals

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There was a ruckus in the stands at a White Sox game at U.S. Cellular Field back in 2004. A woman, among others, was arrested and charged with battery. The charges were eventually dismissed. The woman then turned around and sued the White Sox for violating her civil rights in removing her from the ballpark.

That lawsuit, as lawsuits tend to do, has lingered for several years. It was dismissed on summary judgment. The dismissal was upheld on appeal just the other day.  I don’t really care about the suit itself. But I do care about the judicial activism displayed in the first paragraph of the court’s decision:

Fricano asserts that the Cleveland Indians are “the arch rival” of the Chicago White Sox. While the two teams maintain a healthy rivalry, this court notes that it is generally accepted, at least among informed baseball followers, that the title of arch rival belongs to the reviled Minnesota Twins, to be shared, during inter-league play, with the Chicago Cubs.

I’m hoping that another court decides this question differently and the matter is presented to the Supreme Court.  I could probably make some money as a hired gun consultant or something.

(thanks to Dan Feinstein for the heads up)

Frontier League team names itself the “Florence Y’alls”

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If you’ve ever found yourself on I-75/71 in Kentucky, just over the river from Cincinnati, you’ve no doubt noticed the water tower for the city of Florence, Kentucky.  Its top is painted with red and white stripes and, instead of featuring the town’s name or the name of the local water concern, it says, “Florence, Y’all.”

The water tower is a nice welcome to Dixie, even if Kentucky isn’t really Dixie. The point is that, if you’re from Ohio or Michigan or someplace and you see it, you know you’re on your way to Lexington or Louisville, or points south. To warmer climes, southern charm and hospitality and, hopefully, a nice little trip.

The folks who support the Frontier League baseball team in Florence no doubt realize the kind of chatter that surrounds that water tower, because they just voted to rename their team:

And they added a handy dandy explainer:

I like it. And I like the idea of naming a baseball team after a notable and much talked-about roadside sign. Which is to say that, if I ever get a baseball team here in Ohio, I’m also gonna name it after a famous sign you see while driving on the interstate not too far from me:

Yeah, that’s a thing. And my baseball team would not even be the first sports thing named after it.

Alternatively, I could put one closer to my house and call it the “ODOT SUCKS.” May be better.

Viva local culture.