As a matter of law, the Twins are the White Sox’ arch rivals

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There was a ruckus in the stands at a White Sox game at U.S. Cellular Field back in 2004. A woman, among others, was arrested and charged with battery. The charges were eventually dismissed. The woman then turned around and sued the White Sox for violating her civil rights in removing her from the ballpark.

That lawsuit, as lawsuits tend to do, has lingered for several years. It was dismissed on summary judgment. The dismissal was upheld on appeal just the other day.  I don’t really care about the suit itself. But I do care about the judicial activism displayed in the first paragraph of the court’s decision:

Fricano asserts that the Cleveland Indians are “the arch rival” of the Chicago White Sox. While the two teams maintain a healthy rivalry, this court notes that it is generally accepted, at least among informed baseball followers, that the title of arch rival belongs to the reviled Minnesota Twins, to be shared, during inter-league play, with the Chicago Cubs.

I’m hoping that another court decides this question differently and the matter is presented to the Supreme Court.  I could probably make some money as a hired gun consultant or something.

(thanks to Dan Feinstein for the heads up)