Carlos Gutierrez is in the best shape of his — wait! The best shape EVER

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Best shape of my life? Ha!  Try this on for size. From La Velle Neal:

[Carlos] Gutierrez, I’ve been told, has rededicated himself to conditioning during the offseason and wants to come to camp in the best shape ever. He reported last year noticeably heavier. He could be a bullpen wild card if he can sharpen a second pitch to go with his outstanding sinker.

I take that to mean not just Gutierrez’s life, but the best shape of all people of all time everywhere.  It’s the most likely explanation.

But no, I’m not going to change the meme from BSOML to BSE. Because by definition, only Gutierrez could fit the latter category.