Great Moments in Tortured Metaphors: The Red Sox were unsinkable!

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Rob Bradford of WEEI apparently didn’t read Pete Abraham’s column from yesterday in which Pete made a great case for chilling out about the Red Sox’ recent troubles.  About how this stuff happens on lots of teams and that, because of that, it makes little sense to make this into some sort of high and harrowing drama.

We know he didn’t read it because rather than agree with such a sensible take and say “eh, things went bad but let’s not blow it out of proportion,” Bradford decided to equate the 2011 Red Sox with the most famous story of hubris and avoidable disaster in the history of Western Civilization.

Jason Varitek is the Sox’ captain, see. Do you know who else was the captain of a doomed ship?

The 39-year-old was the captain of the fastest sinking ship in baseball history, thereby surfacing his name among the others. Edward Smith, the captain of the Titantic, wasn’t the one who was supposed to spot the iceberg, yet he is front and center of the boat’s Wikipedia page. When the historical documents are drawn up regarding the 2011 Red Sox, expect Varitek’s name to get similar billing … At least we knew what Smith was supposed to do. Occasionally help steer the ship. Make sure the crew is properly delegated. Keep in communication with other boats. And occasionally have dinner with Kate Winslet. But, to this day, nobody can identify what Varitek was — and is — supposed to do as a result of his title.

Well, at least we aren’t getting carried away with this anymore.

Braves minor leaguer Braxton Davidson fractures foot on walk-off homer in AFL Championship Game

Braxton Davidson
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Braves minor league first baseman Braxton Davidson played the hero during the Arizona Fall League Championship Game on Saturday, but followed up his game-winning homer with what appeared to be a broken left foot.

Braxton had just lofted a 2-1 pitch from Nationals left-hander Taylor Guilbeau in the bottom of the 10th inning and was making his way around the bases when he started hopping on his right foot as he neared the plate. After being helped off the field, that the infielder was quickly taken to a local hospital for further examination, the results of which have yet to be made public.

The 22-year-old helped lift the Peoria Javelinas to their fifth AFL title and second since 2017. He went 2-for-5 with a single and home run in Saturday’s finale over the Salt River Rafters. During the regular season, he completed his third consecutive campaign in High-A and slashed .171/.281/.365 with a career-high 20 home runs and a .646 OPS through 481 plate appearances.