Instant classic: the Red Sox had “nutritional issues”

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Red Sox owner John Henry gave a press conference this morning summing up the team’s problems down the stretch, talking about Terry Francona’s departure and all of that stuff.  We’ll have more on that later this morning, but for now I am preoccupied with one particular thing he said.

When asked about the team’s conditioning — an issue many noted as the Red Sox collapsed — Henry said that all training, throwing, running and cardio work was done as it was supposed to have been done.  He said, however, that there were “nutritional issues” that concerned him.

If you’re at all familiar with my work, you have already realized that “nutritional issues” will now be beaten into the ground by me until the End Times.  It’ll be like the flip side to “Best Shape of His Life” stuff.  I can’t tell you how thrilled I am to have a new arrow in the cliche quiver.

Still, I’m puzzled.  How on earth — given what we know about how the Sox spent their time in the clubhouse — could they have “nutritional issues?”  It almost makes me think that they were drinking the wrong kind of beer.

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