Adam Dunn will be riding the pine for a while

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The other day Brett Ballantini of CSNChicago.com reported that Ozzie Guillen was going to sit down with Adam Dunn sometime soon and discuss a reduced role for the big guy down the stretch.  It seems now that the conversation has been had. Here’s Ozzie Guillen via the Associated Press:

“I don’t know yet. I talked to him we had a little chat. It went nice. He understood my point, I understood his point. Obviously I’m going to (play) the guys that swing the bat good but are you’re going to see him? I can’t say no because he will play some day.”

Dunn has sat for two straight games and there is likely a lot more bench in his immediate future. As Ballantini reported, Dunn pretty much knows the score. He’s hitting .163/.290/.289 in perhaps the worst fall-off-a-cliff season for an elite hitter in living memory.  He’s never complained about much in his career, so he’s not likely to start now.

And hey, there are only three more years and $44 million left on that deal, so there’s that.

Ichiro wore a fake mustache to sneak into the Mariners’ dugout

Associated Press
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Ichiro Suzuki is now a Mariners employee and, as such, he’s not allowed to sit in the dugout during a game. That’s for coaches and players only.

He knows that, too. Indeed, on the day Ichiro announced his sorta-retirement, he talked about how it was going to be hard not to be down on the field with the other players. He even made a ridiculous joke about how, “[he] can’t say for certain that maybe [he] won’t put on a beard and glasses and be like Bobby Valentine and be in the dugout.”

In related news, this mysterious stranger was seen by an Associated Press photographer in the Mariners dugout during the first couple of innings of the M’s-Yankees game:

(AP Photo/Bill Kostroun)

No beard, but I guess that joke was not very ridiculous after all. Either way, by the end of the second inning — poof — he was gone.

Obviously, when something interesting like this happens you mustache an expert for their opinion on the matter. To that end, the Associated Press reached Bobby Valentine, who famously did the same thing after an ejection way back in 1999, for comment:

“He was perfect. I never would have known it was him.”

Valentine was suspended for two games and fined $5,000. I’m assuming Ichiro won’t get hit quite as hard given that he wasn’t defying an umpire’s authority, but even if he does have to pay a fine, he’ll likely do so willingly.