A nation mourns Derek Jeter’s tragic, heroic calf strain

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There are, like, two dozen injury stories a week. Seriously, go back through the HBT archives and you’ll see that a huge percentage of our minor posts are this guy straining that muscle and this or that body part being sore.  It’s easily the most rote kind of post we or anyone else who writes about baseball does because it’s just matter-of-fact news, rarely with any serious potential to impact the general narrative.

But when it’s Derek Jeter, boy howdy, are things different. At least to Ian O’Connor of ESPN New York, who writes about Jeter’s Grade 1 calf strain like it was the bullet that took out the Archduke Ferdinand.

After an opening paragraph that cited an unwritten pact of honor Jeter has with Yankees fans and a second paragraph with the now de riguer Joe DiMaggio comparison, O’Connor cites all of Jeter’s past glories, in which he selflessly put himself before his team, with the ultimate price being paid by his body finally — tragically — breaking down.  Get your hankies out folks:

… if Jeter were available to comment after his MRI he surely would’ve said he would return to the lineup the only way he knows how—ASAP. No captain who busted up his cover-boy face on a teeth-first dive into the stands against Boston in 2004 and then played against the Mets the following night would ever allow a silly little calf strain to keep him down for long … It was something that reminded all witnesses of Jeter’s extensive wear and tear, and of a noble willingness to play hurt that reminded Monahan of certified ruffians the likes of Thurman Munson.

Grade 1 calf strain, dude. Really.

I know O’Connor just wrote a book about Jeter and likely still has stars in his eyes and everything, but save the purple prose for Jeter taking a gunshot wound or dying young of typhus or something.

Astros clinch postseason berth with 11-3 win over Angels

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No surprise here: The Astros are headed back to the postseason to defend their title following a landslide 11-3 win over the Angels on Friday. This figures to be their third playoff run since 2015, though they have yet to wrap up the AL West with a division title.

First baseman Yuli Gurriel led the charge on Friday, smashing a grand slam in the first inning and tacking on a two-run homer in the second and RBI single in the fifth to help the Astros to a seven-run lead. The Angels eventually returned fire, first with Mike Trout‘s 418-foot homer in the sixth, then with an RBI hit from Francisco Arcia in the seventh, but they couldn’t close the gap in time to overtake the Astros.

On the mound, right-hander Gerrit Cole clinched his 15th win of the year after holding the Angels to seven innings of three-run, 12-strikeout ball. His sixth strikeout of the night — delivered on an 83.1-MPH knuckle curveball to Kaleb Cowart — also marked the 1,000th strikeout of his career to date. He was backed by flawless performances by lefty reliever Tony Sipp and rookie right-hander Dean Deetz, both of whom turned in scoreless innings as the offense barreled toward an 11-3 finish with Jake Marisnick‘s sac bunt and George Springer‘s three-run shot in the eighth.

Despite having qualified for the playoffs, the Astros still carry a magic number of 6 as they look to clinch a third straight division title. They’re currently up against the Athletics, who entered Friday’s contest against the Twins just four games back of first place in the AL West.