I’m just going to leave this quote — about Arizona Diamondbacks’ bullpen catcher Jeff Moutzas — right here. You do with it what you will:
Pitcher Livan Hernandez became something of a sadistic benefactor when he arrived in Arizona in 2006. Motuzas said Hernandez once paid him $3,000 to drink a gallon of milk in 12 minutes. The two also hammered out a deal that permitted Hernandez to punch Motuzas in the groin for $50 a pop whenever he felt the urge. Motuzas would receive a $300 bonus after every 10th punch.
Based on that — and it just goes on and on like that — you may or may not want to read the whole profile of the guy at the Wall Street Journal.
We’re gonna need a bigger orchidometer.