You’ll be shocked to hear that Adrian Gonzalez and the Red Sox are making progress on a deal

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It’s cute how we’re still pretending that Theo Epstein — after getting a negotiating window — traded away multiple top prospects for Adrian Gonzalez without having  a deal in place:

An afternoon meeting between the Red Sox and the representatives of first baseman Adrian Gonzalez went “really well’’ yesterday, with all signs pointing toward a long-term deal being struck in a matter of weeks, according to John Boggs, one of Gonzalez’ agents.

I picture these “negotiations” going down like the disarmament talks at the end of “Spies Like Us.”  Solemn statements to the press about the progress being made but, once the doors to the conference room are closed, they’re all in their playing Risk and drinking cocktails while shapely Russian models sit on their lap while listening to “Soul Finger” by the Bar-Kays, the ink on the deal already dry.

What, you mean you didn’t see “Spies Like Us?”  Like you had anything better to do during Christmas break 1985 but to have your mom drive you to the Smoot Theater in Parkersburg, West Virgina to see it in a double feature with “Fletch,” rounding out Chevy Chase’s single best year in cinema?

OK, I may have said too much at this point.

Padres ride double-decker tour bus to AT&T Park

Thearon W. Henderson/Getty Images
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On Sunday morning, the Padres planned to take a bus from their hotel in San Francisco to AT&T Park ahead of their afternoon game. The bus never showed. MLB.com’s AJ Cassavell reports that team director of player and staff services TJ Lasita flagged down an empty San Francisco tour bus, negotiated a rate, and got his players an impromptu ride to the ballpark.

The Padres’ Twitter account and Annie Heilbrunn of the San Diego Union-Tribune tweeted pictures and video:

The Padres and Giants are playing the rubber match of their three-game series this afternoon. The Padres will then travel to Arlington for a series with the Rangers. The Giants will welcome the Rockies.