Chris Coghlan pulls a Kendry Morales: may miss 8 weeks for a celebration injury

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The Marlins announced that Chris Coghlan may miss 6-8 weeks with a torn meniscus. The funny part: he did it while attempting to smash a shaving-cream pie in the face of Wes Helms following Helms’ walkoff single on Sunday.

This is a monumentally stupid way to get injured of course — even dumber than Kendry Morales’ injury if you ask me, because at least Morales’ celebration wasn’t contrived b.s. like the pie thing is — but it’s not without its upside.

For starters, it may make teams finally stop doing the pie in the face thing after walkoff wins. Which, like so many things in life, was kind of fun when people started doing it, but quickly grew tiresome and cliched. Fat guys playing beer league softball are doing it now. Time to move on to something else, major leaguers.

For another thing, Coghlan going on the DL means that the Marlins are going to call up Logan Morrison.  Morrison — who was drafted as a first baseman but has been playing outfield — is a nice prospect, currently hitting .306/.424/.485 in 67 games in New Orleans, and having him up is pretty cool for the fans.

But at the end of the day this is a big negative for the Feesh, even beyond it being a stupid, avoidable injury.  The Marlins have been surging lately, and are starting to get into the wild card conversation, so any loss like this is a problem. Moreover, Florida has been shopping Jorge Cantu, and the hope was that if they moved him, Coghlan could move over to third.  Now that’s all out the window.

But hey, Wes Helms got pie, and he probably liked that.

It sounds like Adrián Beltré is mulling retirement

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Rangers third baseman Adrián Beltré is dealing with a Grade 2 strain of his left hamstring, marking the third time this season the 39-year-old has dealt with a hamstring issue. The injuries are weighing on Beltré, who sounds like he is mulling retirement.

Gerry Fraley of the Dallas Morning News reports that Beltré said, “It brings the question of is this going to keep happening more often? Is it worth it to fight back? Is it a sign that it’s getting closer to time to say good-bye to you guys?”

In 358 plate appearances this season, Beltré has hit .278/.335/.394 with seven home runs and 41 RBI. His .729 OPS would be his lowest since 2009, when he put up a .683 OPS with the Mariners. Beltré is a free agent after the season and turns 40 years old in April. It wouldn’t be surprising if he decided to call it quits after this season. If he does hang ’em up, Beltré will be — in this writer’s humble opinion — a first-ballot Hall of Famer when he is eligible five years from retirement.