Matt Stairs picked to replace Lawrence Taylor as Nutrisystem spokesperson

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Nutrisystem dropped Lawrence Taylor as a spokesperson following yesterday’s rape charge and today they replaced him on the website with … Matt Stairs.
After being short and stocky for the first 17 seasons of his career, Stairs dropped 30 pounds during the offseason and claimed a spot on the Padres’ bench at age 42.
And now he gets to replace Taylor on the Nutrisystem website right next to “celebrity success stories” like Tony Orlando, Marie Osmond, and Phillies manager Charlie Manuel.
Sadly, in addition to shedding 30 pounds Stairs’ trademark curly mullet is also gone. He still has better “hair” than Tony Orlando, though.

Clayton Kershaw might return to the Dodgers’ rotation next week

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Dodgers southpaw Clayton Kershaw is nearing his return to the mound, according to club manager Dave Roberts. Both Kershaw (left biceps tendinitis) and fellow lefty Rich Hill (left middle finger blister) are scheduled to toss simulated games on Saturday; depending on the outcome, Roberts says Kershaw could forgo a minor league assignment and slot back into the rotation by Thursday.

Kershaw, 30, was diagnosed with biceps tendinitis as the team closed out their Mexico Series at the start of the month. He has not made a start in several weeks, but was finally able to resume throwing on Sunday and managed to get through two successful bullpen sessions. Though Dodgers’ ace hasn’t been completely injury-free over his 11-year career in the majors, this is the first significant issue he’s had with his pitching arm so far. The team is expected to take every precaution with the lefty, and will likely limit him to just four innings during Saturday’s simulated game.

Prior to his injury, Kershaw was working on another dominant run with the club, sporting a 2.86 ERA, 2.0 BB/9 and 9.8 SO/9 through his first 44 innings of the season. While Kershaw, Hill and left-handed starter Hyun-Jin Ryu served their respective terms on the disabled list this month, the Dodgers utilized a combination of relievers Ross Stripling and Brock Stewart, both of whom impressed during their limited time in the rotation.