Mascots beware: Randall Simon is still around

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Randall Simon played eight seasons in the majors, batting .283 with a decent .742 OPS as a part-time first baseman for six different teams, but he’s most famous for two things:
1) Braves teammate called him a “fat monkey” in an interview with Sports Illustrated.
2) During the mascot “Sausage Race” in Milwaukee he leaned out of the dugout and swung his bat at a female college student who was wearing the Italian sausage costume, knocking her to the ground and earning a fine for disorderly conduct.
Simon hasn’t played in the majors since 2006, but is still trying to grind out a baseball career and has signed with the Rockford RiverHawks of the independent Northern League. Upon acquiring the 34-year-old Simon they issued a statement saying: “He gives us some sort of identity of who we are and what we are about.”
In other words, spiced meats in and around the Rockford area may want to avoid RiverHawks games.

Brandon Crawford homers off brother-in-law Gerrit Cole

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You can’t pick your family and no one knows that better than Giants shortstop Brandon Crawford. His sister Amy married Astros starter Gerrit Cole in November 2016, so the two players are brothers-in-law.

The two players have matched up against each other 18 times in the past, as Cole spent his first five seasons in the National League with the Pirates. Cole often won that battle, holding Crawford to four hits — all singles — in 18 plate appearances.

Crawford finally got the better of Cole on Tuesday night, hitting a line drive into the appropriately-named Crawford Boxes at Minute Maid Park for a two-run home run, cutting the Astros’ lead to 5-2.