Johnny Damon: "I can't wait forever"

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On the New York Yankees, that is:

“I am going to start looking around. Teams are getting better and there
are teams interested. I can’t wait
forever and I am sure [the Yankees] are trying to figure things out. I
have to be ready . . . Matt Holliday, the stuff on him is starting to pick up. And wherever Bay doesn’t end up will open a
door for me.”

This sounds an awful lot like my kids when they threaten to run away from home. “I’m really goin’, you watch . . . I’m walkin’ to the door . . .I’m puttin’ my hand on the handle . . . I’m turnin’ the handle . . . I’m about to run away . . . here I go . . .”

My kids always come back and eat their vegetables. Johnny Damon will come back and take his two year deal. I let my kids douse the veggies in ranch dressing to make it more palatable. I suppose the Yankees will build in some elaborate vesting option to do the same for Damon. But really: my kids ultimately have to do what I say, and Damon ultimately wants to stay in New York. The Yankees and I have all the cards in our respective transactions.