And That Happened: Tuesday's scores and highlights

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Dodgers 8, Mets 0: Somewhere on Long Island there’s a guy who
went to last night’s game for the express purpose of booing Manny and
holding up a sign with a syringe on it or something. And, yes, Manny
was booed and was even ejected from the game for arguing balls and
strikes! Dude from Long Island was probably loving it! Too bad, then,
that Manny also knocked in three runs and then, after his ejection,
watched the Dodgers complete a pretty damn dominant performance from
the clubhouse while eating candy and drinking soda or whatever it is
Manny does.

Rays 3, Blue Jays 1: Phun Pfact: Map makers will sometimes slip
in phantom streets or towns or something so that they can tell if a
competing map maker is really just copying their work. I suspect that
the people who put together box scores do the same thing. Evidence: the
“pitcher” named Marc Rzepczynski. He doesn’t really exist. He’s a
copyright protection device. He was created by the NBC Sports people so
that they can tell if Yahoo! is ripping off the scores. At least I’m
pretty sure that’s the case.

Tigers 8, Royals 5: Verlander wasn’t particularly sharp, but he
strikes out 11 because the Royals aren’t particularly sharp either.
According to the game story, Verlander’s 141 strikeouts are the most by
a Detroit pitcher before the All-Star Game in 37 years. Of course that
was Mickey Lolich, and Mickey Lolich used to pitch approximately 598
innings a year back in the early 70s, so Verlander’s feat is far more
impressive.

White Sox 10, Indians 6: I’m struggling to think of a trade that
was as disastrous for both teams involved as the Perez-DeRosa trade has
been this far for Cleveland and St. Louis. Paul Konerko drove in seven.
Why is it, despite the fact that he’s 33 years-old and has been in the
league for 12 years, that I still think of him as a Dodgers’ prospect?
Same thing happened to me with Robin Ventura for his whole career. No
matter how old he got, I pictured him playing for Oklahoma State in the
1987 College World Series. Maybe the White Sox uniforms have some sort
of time warping effect or something.

Orioles 12, Mariners 4: Luke Scott was a one-man wrecking crew
(3-4, HR, 3B, 7 RBI). From the game story: “Ichiro Suzuki has turned
down MLB’s request to participate in the Home Run Derby.” Wait, what?
The guy hits six homers a year. The only reason they’d want him in
there is as a cynical rating ploy for the Japanese market, which I’m
assuming gets the All-Star broadcast. Good for him for not wanting to
be used like that.

Cardinals 5, Brewers 0: Both Brewers’ bench coach Willie
Randolph and hitting coach Dale Sveum were ejected. I said at the
beginning of the year that it may be awkward for both of these former
managers to be in subordinate roles this year. I’d like to think, then,
that their ejections were really auditions for any managerial openings
that pop up the rest of the year.

Braves 2, Cubs 1: Javier Vazquez continues to get no run
support, but he didn’t need much last night, as he gave a single run in
seven innings. His ERA is down to 2.95, but because his record is only
6-7, he doesn’t make the All-Star Game. Total ripoff.

Pirates 6, Astros 3: I can’t think of a single thing to say about this game, so I’ll say this: my son, Carlo, recently discovered the book Where the Wild Things Are.
He loves it. I loved it when I was a kid, and I love reading it to him.
I think our love of it is based on the fact that, deep down, we both
have anger issues. Nothing crazy — neither of us are violent or
bombastic — but both he and I are easily frustrated and often stomp
around a bit in something not unlike the book’s wild rumpus when things
don’t go just the way we planned. The book, you see, is really about
anger, and how it’s natural and follows a predictable but necessary arc
before resolving itself and how ultimately it’s OK. But the thing is,
the beauty of the book has a lot to do with the fact that it’s only ten
sentences long and can be read in a couple of minutes, even if you
linger on the pictures a bit. It follows that anger arc and resolves
itself pretty quickly, resulting in an almost therapeutic effect. Which
makes me wonder how in the hell they’re going to make a movie out of it.
And why they felt the need to in the first place. I hope my son never
gets wind of the movie, because I don’t want the wonderful few minutes
we spend with the book each night to be sullied in any way.

Sorry Pirates and Astros fans. I’ll try to pay more attention tomorrow night.

Red Sox 5, A’s 2: Round numbers galore: Beckett’s 10th win,
Bay’s 20th home run, Giambi’s 0 for 4. I guess what I’m saying is that
nothing out of the ordinary happened.

Reds 4, Phillies 3: Way to bounce back after getting
slaughtered. A couple of homers for Brandon Phillips and a single off
of Brad Lidge carried the day.

Yankees 10, Twins 2: Production from all over the Yankees’ order in this one, as Cano, Gardner and Cervelli combine to go 7-14 with 6 RBI.

Rockies 5, Nationals 4: Defensive breakdowns killed the Nats,
with the last being a potentially inning-ending comebacker that Joe
Beimel threw to the wrong guy down at second.

Rangers 8, Angels 5: And we’re tied again, as Andruw Jones — on
an unexpected hot streak — blasts a three-run homer in the course of a
big fifth inning. In addition to the game, the Angels lose Vlad to a
knee injury that, while maybe not terribly serious, has to be enough to
keep him from ever playing the field again, right? I mean, he has to be
a DH at this point, doesn’t he?

Diamondbacks 4, Padres 3: Four in a row for Arizona, all coming
after Mark Reynolds yelled at everyone on his team. Coincidence? Well,
yes, it most like is a coincidence, actually.

Giants 3, Marlins 0: It’s probably against the rules for Tim
Lincecum to have dressed up in Barry Zito’s uniform and pitch last
night, but he apparently did it anyway (8.1 IP, 4 H, 0 ER).

Adrián Beltré is a slam dunk Hall of Famer

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Rangers third baseman Adrián Beltré officially announced his retirement on Tuesday, ending months of speculation about his future. The 39-year-old put together one of the greatest careers we have ever seen, spending time with the Dodgers, Mariners, Red Sox, and Rangers across 21 seasons.

Beltré will be eligible for the Hall of Fame five years from now. Given how much more analytically-literate the electorate has become in recent years, Beltré will very likely get the requisite 75 percent of the vote to earn enshrinement in Cooperstown. In a just world, he would get 100 percent of the vote, but no player has ever gone into the Hall of Fame unanimously.

Beltré retires having hit .286/.339/.480 with 477 home runs, 1,707 RBI, 1,524 runs scored, and 121 stolen bases in 12,130 plate appearances. Beltré hit for the cycle three times: in 2008 with the Mariners, and in 2012 and 2015 with the Rangers. He won four Silver Sluggers and made the All-Star team four times, both of which seem criminally low. He also won five Gold Gloves and two Platinum Gloves. For the bulk of his career, he was arguably the best defensive third baseman if not just in his league then in all of baseball. Injuries slowed Beltré in his 30’s, particularly in the last two seasons, but despite that, he showed when he was healthy that he could still hang with the young guns in his old age. No one would have been surprised if he hung around for one more season. Despite health issues, Beltré still hit around the league average with above-average defense.

Among Hall of Famers who played at least 50 percent of their career games at third base, Beltré’s career 95.7 WAR ranks behind only Mike Schmidt (106.8) and Eddie Mathews (96.6), per Baseball Reference. He’s ahead of Wade Boggs (91.4), George Brett (88.7), and Chipper Jones (85.2). Those six are the only third basemen in the 80’s when it comes to WAR.

As Jon Morosi points out, Beltré is the only third baseman in baseball history with 3,000-plus hits and 400-plus home runs. Individually, the 3,000-hit club boasts only 32 members while the 400-homer club has 55 members. Beltré’s 3,166 hits and 477 homes rank 16th and 30th, respectively.

Beltré’s numbers are absurdly good, but beyond that, he was a character. He took the game quite seriously, but he was still able to have fun. He became one of the most .gif-able players in the game. Beltré didn’t like his head being touched, so when he approached or went through the dugout collecting high-fives after hitting home runs, his teammates would oftentimes playfully pat him or rub his head. Beltré would pretend to go after them in revenge.

Beltré once borrowed groundskeeping equipment in order to avoid Gatorade baths.

Beltré wasn’t afraid to drop to one knee to hit a homer, either.

Beltré played games with his opponents after successfully swiping a base.

Beltré got into standoffs with opposing players, further proving he’s anything but an easy out.

Beltré made relevant cultural references.

Beltré once trolled the umpire, who asked him to get back into the on-deck circle, by moving the on-deck circle.

Happy trails to not only one of the best players of his generation, but to one of the most entertaining as well. Baseball will be poorer without Adrián Beltré. His Hall of Fame induction ceremony should be tremendous, though.