NEW YORK, NY - APRIL 27:  Former ESPN Analyst Curt Schilling talks about his ESPN dismissal and politics during SiriusXM's Breitbart News Patriot Forum hosted Stephen K. Bannon and co-host Alex Marlow at the SiriusXM Studio on April 27, 2016 in New York, New York.  (Photo by Cindy Ord/Getty Images for SiriusXM)

Curt Schilling proposes a total end to immigration and summary executions

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Two bombs went off in New York and New Jersey over the weekend. Scary, but thankfully no one was killed and, thankfully, law enforcement found and captured the suspect in short order.

Coolheaded thinking by the public — no one freaked out and several aided in the identification of other bombs and the capture of the suspect — and good work by law enforcement turned what, regrettably, is a reoccurring risk in 21st century America into a short story indeed. What has become a new normal for the United States in the past 15 years, and what the rest of the world has dealt with longer, is now something that can be dealt with sanely.

Which makes me wonder what will happen if Curt Schilling gets his way and somehow manages to get elected to political office. Because his reactions to the bombing over the weekend was the stuff of undiluted hysteria. Listen to the man with the plan:

When the Yankees were up 3-1 on the Red Sox in the 2004 ALCS Schilling’s first instinct was probably to slip the entire Yankees team mickeys and put icy hot in their jocks.

Anyway, Vote Schilling. You need him on that wall. Which he called a “Berlin Wall,” and which he would build immediately to stop bombings in New York somehow.

Curt Schilling is considering running against Elizabeth Warren in 2018

NEW YORK, NY - APRIL 27:  Former ESPN Analyst Curt Schilling talks about his ESPN dismissal and politics during SiriusXM's Breitbart News Patriot Forum hosted Stephen K. Bannon and co-host Alex Marlow at the SiriusXM Studio on April 27, 2016 in New York, New York.  (Photo by Cindy Ord/Getty Images for SiriusXM)
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Last week Curt Schilling said that he was planning on running for office one day. “State office first,” he said, “white house in 8 years . . .or 4 if by some amazing illegal event this country elects another clinton.” Maybe by “state office” he didn’t mean state government but, rather, statewide office, because he said on a radio spot yesterday that he may have Massachusetts senator Elizabeth Warren in his sights:

“I would like to be one of the people responsible for getting Elizabeth Warren out of politics,” said Schilling. “She’s a nightmare. The left’s holding her up as the second coming of Hillary Clinton, Lord knows we don’t need the first.”

That could simply mean that he’s going to work to have someone, anyone, beat Warren, but the Boston Globe took it to mean that he’d consider running. He certainly has the ego for it. And my God, it would be great fun.

Not quite as much fun as it is to sit back and think for a few moments about how angry it must make Schilling to know that he’s represented in the Senate by two liberals like Warren and Ed Markey, but still a lot of fun.

Curt Schilling says he’s going to run for office

NEW YORK, NY - APRIL 27:  Former ESPN Analyst Curt Schilling talks about his ESPN dismissal and politics during SiriusXM's Breitbart News Patriot Forum hosted Stephen K. Bannon and co-host Alex Marlow at the SiriusXM Studio on April 27, 2016 in New York, New York.  (Photo by Cindy Ord/Getty Images for SiriusXM)
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It’s been a big 24 hours for polarizing athletes announcing their intentions to do stuff they’re not qualified to do. This morning it was Tim Tebow and baseball, last night it was Curt Schilling and politics.

Schilling was hard at work yesterday doing what he seems to spend most of his time doing — vigilantly passing along conservative memes and cherrypicking news stories to portray the world as a liberal-dominated hellscape — when someone said he was going to lose his upcoming election. Schilling corrected the person, noting that he’s not running for anything. Then, however, he teased that he would.

“I am going to run, soon,” Schilling said. When a commenter asked him for details he said, “state office first, white house in 8 years . . .or 4 if by some amazing illegal event this country elects another clinton.”

He added a smiley emoticon in there somewhere, suggesting at least part of that was tongue-in-cheek. If I had to guess from the tone and from his overall Facebook oeuvre, I’d say that he’s serious about the statewide office and that he seriously believes Hillary Clinton winning the election would somehow constitute an illegal act.

My guess is that he would not actually run for president, though. He probably knows he’s not yet qualified to do so. You have to have bankrupted far more businesses and failed in media far more than Schilling has to get the Republican nomination these days. He’s really an amateur by comparison.