Craig Calcaterra

FILE - In this Sunday, March 13, 2016, New York Mets starter Matt Harvey pitches during the first inning of an exhibition spring training baseball game against the Miami Marlins in Jupiter, Fla. The Mets are giving the ball to Harvey, who will get another shot at the World Series champions on opening day. Manager Terry Collins announced the decision Thursday, March 17, 2016, for the April 3 game in Kansas City.  (AP Photo/Brynn Anderson, File)
Associated Press

The New York tabloids are having fun with Matt Harvey’s, um, condition

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As a guy who spent a couple of hours on Twitter making pee jokes about the Mets’ number one starter’s health issues yesterday I have no room to act all haughty and superior about how the tabloids are covering the whole story.

Yes, it was probably pretty scary for Harvey to have blood clots in his bladder, but you can’t walk into the clubhouse and immediately say that your ailment was because you don’t pee often enough and NOT expect all of us immature morons to joke about it.

The Post and the Daily News, sadly, hit on the same headline joke. That happens sometimes and they probably hate it when it happens. But it’s a pretty good joke so they have nothing to be ashamed of, really.

 

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Video: Anthony Rizzo plays “Drops of Jupiter” for his teammates, who all sing along

Chicago Cubs' Anthony Rizzo is greeted in the dugout after hitting a solo home run against the Los Angeles Angels during the third inning of a spring training baseball game, Monday, March 28, 2016, in Tempe, Ariz. (AP Photo/Matt York)
Associated Press
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Today at Cubs camp, that wacky Joe Maddon started workouts by having the team check out Mozart while they did Tae-Bo followed by a lunch featuring no love pride deep-fried chicken and the best soy lattes that a major league baseball team ever had.

In other news, Train’s “Drops of Jupiter” may be one of the worst songs ever recorded in the history of music:

 

Legend holds that the Cubs were once cursed for 70+ years over a billy goat. If there’s any justice in the world — at least if the justice is delivered based on one’s musical tastes — the Cubs will now fail to win a World Series until 2045. At the very earliest.

MLB, Apple enter into an agreement allowing teams to use stat-loaded iPads in dugouts

A man looks at his iPad while sitting in a cafe in central Beijing June 6, 2012. REUTERS/David Gray
Associated Press
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Apple and Major League Baseball have entered into a multi-year agreement in which every team will be given iPad Pro tablets loaded with analytics and other stuff to be used in-game, in dugouts, The Wall Street Journal reports. This corresponds with MLB’s lifting of a ban on using laptops, tablets and smartphones in dugouts.

In addition to any number of analytical tools, spray charts and the like, the iPads will have video so a hitter will be able to, for example, watch video of a pitcher he is about to face without having to go back into the clubhouse. This is convenient for teams and Rob Manfred touts it as a means of speeding up games (eh, sure, OK). It’s also quite convenient for Apple, which will no doubt benefit from lots of live TV footage of the sports’ biggest stars using iPads in the middle of games. In this, the Wall Street Journal notes, it’s sort of like the NFL’s adoption of Microsoft Surface tablets on sidelines. Except this time, when broadcasters make note of the devices, calling them “iPads” will actually be accurate.

Use of the iPads will be optional — from the players’ and coaches’ point of view it’s a tool, not merely a forced product placement — but given that clubs will be able to load these things up with their own proprietary analytics you can expect pretty wide adoption. People like to stereotype managers and coaches as old crusty types who, at best, use a binder, but not a single one of them doesn’t have a smart phone on them all dang day when they’re not in the dugout. Indeed, you haven’t lived until you’ve seen one of them texting somebody from the bat at the Winter Meetings. It’s like watching your uncle play Bejeweled Blitz.

Anyway, this is pretty cool. Both for baseball and for people like me. Because despite this innovation, and despite an extended quote from Rob Manfred in the article about the predominance of technology and analytics in the game and how they “affect the way we judge players, make decisions on the field and the way fans consume the game,” this will no doubt lead to some columnist or broadcaster to talk about how bad and wrong this development is, complete with the words “new-fangled” and references to how so-and-so old timer didn’t need an iPad to hit a breaking ball.

Yep, it’s gonna be glorious.