And That Happened: Monday’s scores and highlights

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Marlins 7, Angels 1: Giancarlo Stanton hit a three-run homer, Jarred Cosart allowed one run on seven hits in seven and two-thirds and the Angels dropped back into a tie with the A’s for first place in the west. Wade LeBlanc — taking his first turn in rotation as Garret Richards’ replacement — gave up six runs on seven hits in three and a third. In other news, someone please needs to tell me why the Angels did not put a waiver claim on Bartolo Colon or Scott Feldman.

Athletics 8, Astros 2: The A’s gain ground behind Jeff Samardzija, who struck out ten in eight innings and Josh Donaldson, who was back in action, and drove in three on two doubles and a single. It was close until the top of the ninth, but the Astros bullpen decided not to show up.

Orioles 9, Rays 1: Five homers for the most homer-happy team in baseball. Delmon Young, J.J. Hardy and Chris Davis homered back-to-back-to-back in the fifth. Delmon Young’s post-game “everyone needs to stop panicking” quote was odd:

“It’s good because it seemed like y’all went in panic mode when we got swept in Chicago,” Young said. “We weren’t scoring many runs, but it happens and then we’re back in our division at home facing a guy we’ve seen before, a team we play, we know their tendencies and everything. And we’ve got better facilities here than Wrigley.”

Is he really saying a crappy locker room in Wrigley Field is part of why they got swept by the Cubs?

Rangers 2, Mariners 0Miles Mikolas tossed eight scoreless innings, allowing only three hits. After the game he gave credit to his catcher, Tom Telis. To which I say: “wait, who are these guys again?”

Rockies 3, Giants 2: Tyler Matzek struck out seven in seven innings and the Rockies took their third in a row. Fourth overall at AT&T Park. The Giants hit into four double plays. Or you can say the Rockies turned four if you don’t want to be all negative about it, man. The Rockies scored two in the fourth thanks to two throwing errors by Brandon Crawford and a balk by Jake Peavy. It’s hard not to spin that negatively.

Red Sox 4, Blue Jays 3: Yoenis Cespedes singled home the go-ahead run in the 10th to help end the Sox’ eight-game losing streak. They almost helped extend it by blowing a 3-0 lead in the ninth. That’s when Clay Buchholz — working on a shutout — put three runners on base with only one out before John Farrell went and got him. Koji Uehara allowed all three to score, however. It’s the sort of bad inning that kills a team, but when you’re playing a team that does a good job of killing itself like the Jays do, you can sometimes get away with it.

Brewers 10, Padres 1: Kyle Lohse allowed a run and four hits over six innings and Ryan Braun and Aramis Ramirez homered. Ramirez and Gerardo Parra had three RBI, while Braun, Ramirez and Carlos Gomez each had three hits.

Cardinals 3, Pirates 2: A three-run seventh inning sends the Pirates to their seventh loss in ten games. John Lackey allowed one run over seven.

Phillies 3, Nationals 2: A.J. Burnett allowed one run over seven innings and struck out 12, after which he walked back his “I’ll probably retire after this season” talk from his last start. The Phillies have won four of five.

Yankees 8, Royals 1: The fifth straight win for the Yankees, this one coming behind Michael Pineda who allowed only one run while pitching into the seventh. Jacoby Ellsbury was 3 for 5 with a two-run homer and three driven in. He also picked up his 1,000th career hit.

The Braves will be serving some insane food this season

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Lots of teams have crazy concession items and lots of them will circulate photos of the more gonzo ones in the coming week leading up to the baseball season. The Braves, however, have been one of the more aggressive players in the gimmick concession item game in recent years, and they just sent around a release talking about some of the stuff they, and their concessionaire, Delaware North, will be serving at their new ballpark, Sun Trust Park, in 2017.

Among them:a blackened catfish po boy, which is a blackened 6-ounce filet of catfish cut up among three tacos, with a cajun remoulade. Some BBQ beef brisket sliders. A double burger. An ice cream bar. They’re also going to have a regionally-inspired thing called “The Taste of Braves Country,” showcasing southern cooking from Georgia, South Carolina, North Carolina, Tennessee, Mississippi and Alabama. Which they’re calling “Braves Country.” Accurate enough, I guess, even if some of us are old enough to remember when they aspired to be a national team. Alas.

The big item, though, is this one:

It’s called the “Tomahawk Chop” sandwich. It’s a fried pork chop with collard green slaw and white BBQ sauce. It serves four and costs $26. I’m guessing it tastes fantastic, but I think the name is pretty cringeworthy for the same reason the cheer which gives it its name is. And, given the dynamics of the Braves move to their new stadium, the choice of BBQ sauce is . . . amusing? I dunno.

Anyway, enjoy, Braves fans.

Max Scherzer will not be ready for Opening Day

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Ten days ago Nationals ace Max Scherzer said he’d be ready for the start of the regular season. “I’m gonna do it,” Scherzer said.

[Ron Howard from “Arrested Development” voice] — No, he’s not:

Nationals manager Dusty Baker said that Max Scherzer is not on track to be the team’s opening day starter, and will most likely open the season as the third pitcher in the rotation.

He’s still projected to make it to the opening rotation, taking the hill, most likely, on Thursday April 6 against the Marlins. At least if the schedule doesn’t slip any more.

Scherzer, as you probably know, has a stress fracture in the knuckle of his right ring finger, which has messed with his preparation and has caused him to alter his grip a bit. As of now Stephen Strasburg will get the Opening Day nod.