The Braves are policing imaginary offenses again

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Brian McCann is gone, but the Braves Decorum Police are still on the beat.

In yesterday’s game David Carpenter threw a pitch at Rockies hitter Corey Dickerson. I invite Braves fans to try to argue it wasn’t intentional, but it so clearly was that you’re embarrassing yourself if you claim otherwise. Watch it here.

The reason for the plunking: Dickerson hit catcher Gerald Laird with a foul tip and then caught him with a backswing on a foul ball just before, knocking him out of the game. That really does suck — a guy can get seriously hurt like that and Laird was down in the dirt for a long time — but there was no motive for Dickerson to do that to Laird on purpose whatsoever. And it’s not like Dickerson has magical powers and could direct the foul tip at Laird. And Laird himself said after the game that he knew the whole sequence was unintentional.

But don’t tell that to Carpenter. He got ejected and Rockies manager Walt Weiss got ejected for a particularly over-the-top argument, after which he smashed a bat into the dugout wall. Then Rockies and Braves pitchers started throwing at each other, leading to more ejections.

But hey, at least Carpenter taught Dickerson a lesson. About what, I have no idea, but he sure taught him.

Clayton Kershaw struggles with control, walks six Marlins

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Dodgers ace Clayton Kershaw entered Wednesday night’s start against the Marlins without having issued a walk in his previous three starts. In fact, his last walk came on April 3 when he issued a free pass to Paul Goldschmidt with the bases empty and two outs in the bottom of the first inning. All told, Kershaw was on a streak of 26 walk-less innings before he took the mound at home to take on the Marlins.

Kershaw started off Wednesday in character, striking out the side in the first inning. He issued a walk in a tough second inning, but escaped without allowing a run. Kershaw walked two more in the third and again danced out of danger. In the fourth, Kershaw walked Lewis Brinson to load the bases with no outs and — you guessed it — didn’t end up allowing a run. His errant control finally came back to bite him in the fifth when Kershaw issued back-to-back two-out walks, then served up a three-run home run to Miguel Rojas down the left field line. His night was done when he completed the inning. Five innings, three runs, five hits, six walks, seven strikeouts, 112 pitches.

The six walks Kershaw issued over five innings marked his first six-walk outing since April 7, 2010 when he issued six free passes to the Pirates in 4 2/3 innings. The only other time he walked as many was on August 3, 2009 against the Brewers in a four-plus inning outing. Kershaw hasn’t even walked five batters in an outing recently — the last time was September 23, 2012 against the Reds.