Bryce Harper: please show yourself out

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Some people think Bryce Harper is the seventh best Nationals player. I don’t think that. That’s just the odd CW that has developed in the last week or so because someone, somewhere thinks that he needs to be taught a lesson, learn his place or who the heck knows what.

But my god, he needs to be put in detention for this tweet during last night’s NFL Draft:

The best part of it is that right before I saw that tweet, I saw a bunch of people tweeting about how if you make a “Clown question, bro” joke about the Clowney pick, you’re pretty much the worst hack Twitter comedian ever:

Part of me hopes Harper purely and innocently came up with that on his own. Part of me hopes he was reading Berman’s feed and decided to mess with everyone. Either way, it’s just reason number 3,443,259 that I don’t watch the draft. I watched “Kill Bill Vol. 1” on Netflix and then the first couple innings of the Dodgers-Giants game. And I feel so much better about that.

Masahiro Tanaka throws a Maddux

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You do know what a Maddux is, right? In case you forgot, it’s a complete game shutout in which the starter throws fewer than 100 pitches. Friend of HBT Jason Lukehart invented that little metric and, because Greg Maddux is my favorite player ever, it’s pretty much my favorite stat ever.

In the Yankees-Red Sox game tonight it was Masahiro Tanaka doing the honors, tossing 97-pitch three-hitter in which he only allowed one runner to reach second base to beat Boston 3-0. He only struck out three but he didn’t walk anyone. He retired the last 14 batters he faced.

Chris Sale was no slouch himself, striking out ten in eight innings. He’s pitched great this year but he’s not getting any help. The Sox have only scored four runs in his five starts. Boston has scored only 13 runs in their last seven games. They’ve been shut out three times in the past seven. They scored more runs than anyone last year, by the way.

The game only took two hours and twenty-one minutes. Or, like, half the time of a Yankees-Red Sox game in the early 2000s. Progress, people. We’re making progress.

Shelby Miller has a tear in his UCL, considering Tommy John surgery

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Nick Piecoro of the Arizona Republic reports that Diamondbacks pitcher Shelby Miller has a tear in his ulnar collateral ligament and is considering undergoing Tommy John surgery. Surgery would end Miller’s 2017 season and would cut into a significant portion — if not all — of his 2018 season as well.

Miller sent his MRI results to Dr. Neal ElAttrache and Dr. James Andrews for second and third opinions, respectively. He could choose to rehab his elbow rather than undergo surgery, but that comes with its own set of positives and negatives.

Miller lasted only four-plus innings in his most recent start on Sunday and carries a 4.09 ERA on the season, his second with the Diamondbacks. His time in Arizona has not gone well.