Brett Ratner buys the film rights to Yasiel Puig’s life story

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You all make fun of me for being in the bag for Puig, but when I’m invited to the gala premiere at Grauman’s Chinese Theater or wherever, I’ll have the last laugh:

Brett Ratner has acquired movie rights to the story of Los Angeles Dodger Yasiel Puig’s escape from Cuba. He will produce the project with Beau Flynn . . . Puig, who was the National League Rookie of the Year last season, tried to escape from his home country of Cuba several times and finally succeeded with the help of smugglers working for a Mexican drug cartel who took him to the Yucatan Peninsula. The cartel then held him captive for three weeks after his backer allegedly did not pay enough money.

Ratner is currently working on “Beverly Hills Cop 4,” so you know the man is busy and knows quality entertainment. So this ought to be awesome.

Who plays Plaschke?

Brandon McCarthy wins final spot in Dodgers’ rotation

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We learned on Monday that Hyun-Jin Ryu won one of the final two spots in the Dodgers’ starting rotation. Brandon McCarthy has won the other, Bill Plunkett of the Orange County Register reports. Alex Wood was McCarthy’s competitor for the spot.

McCarthy, 33, posted a 4.85 ERA across four appearances spanning 13 innings this spring, yielding seven earned runs on 14 hits and a walk with seven strikeouts. Wood, a southpaw, gave up five earned runs in six innings against the Reds on Tuesday, which might have factored into the decision.

Last season, McCarthy made nine starts and one relief appearance, posting a 4.95 ERA with a 44/26 K/BB ratio in 40 innings. In the event McCarthy falters, the club has Wood as well as Julio Urias and the injured Scott Kazmir as potential replacements.

Yankees re-sign Jon Niese to a minor league deal

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The Yankees have re-signed pitcher Jon Niese to a minor league contract, George A. King III of the New York Post reports. Niese was released on Sunday, but he’ll stick around and provide rotation depth for the Yankees.

Niese had knee surgery last August and got a late start to spring training as a result. In six spring appearances lasting an inning each, the lefty gave up three earned runs on five hits and a walk with five strikeouts.

Niese, a veteran of nine seasons, put up an aggregate 5.50 ERA with an 88/47 K/BB ratio in 121 innings last season between the Pirates and Mets.