Joe Torre issues a statement on the Michael Pineda pine tar thing — we translate it for you.

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Let’s play “Translate Joe Torre.” Here’s what his mouth said:

“The umpires did not observe an application of a foreign substance during the game and the issue was not raised by the Red Sox. Given those circumstances, there are no plans to issue a suspension, but we intend to talk to the Yankees regarding what occurred.”

Here’s what he actually meant to convey:

“Look, we all saw what was going on because the TV cameras are awesome these days. The Red Sox saw it too. And I imagine the umpires did too, but I am going to say they didn’t ‘observe’ it because those are totally two different things and who wants to open up that friggin’ can of worms? Anyway, everyone uses sunscreen and pine tar and crap, and we are going to tell the Yankees that, lest they ruin it for EVERYONE, they had best make sure their pitchers are a little less bleedin’ obvious about it.”

Danny Farquhar taken to hospital after fainting in dugout

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White Sox reliever Danny Farquhar passed out in the dugout after completing his outing against the Astros on Friday evening. The cause of the incident has yet to be determined, but Farquhar was supervised by the club’s medical personnel and EMTs and regained consciousness before being taken to Rush University Medical Center for further treatment and testing. A diagnosis has not been announced by the team.

Farquhar pitched 2/3 of an inning in relief during Friday’s 10-0 loss to Houston. He was brought in to relieve James Shields in the top of the sixth inning and was immediately bested by George Springer, who belted a ground-rule double down the right field line and scored Brian McCann and Derek Fisher for the Astros’ sixth and seventh runs of the night. He recovered to strike out Jose Altuve, but was again punished with a two-run homer from Carlos Correa (his first of two), and induced a fly out to end the inning.

The 31-year-old righty pitched just 7 1/3 innings with the club prior to Friday’s performance, issuing four hits, three runs, two homers and eight strikeouts in seven appearances.