Clayton Kershaw and the “New Girl” curse

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What else could it be?

Clayton Kershaw walked three batters in the third and gave up five runs Monday against the A’s. Sam Fuld and Nick Punto, of all people, did the damage against him. Last week, he allowed three runs and five hits in two innings against the Diamondbacks, so after two spring outings, he’s currently sporting an 18.00 ERA.

All of this comes after Kershaw struck out on the FOX sitcom “New Girl” last month, getting quickly rebuffed after identifying himself and hitting on Zooey Deschanel’s character in the show. Nothing since has worked out right for him.

Kershaw admitted after Monday’s game that he had no explanation for his struggles: “The first two innings it felt like most things were working. In the third inning obviously nothing was working. I don’t know. If I knew, I would have fixed it.”

But we know what’s wrong. It’s obvious. And the curse won’t be lifted until after Kershaw guest stars on an NBC offering, perhaps About A Boy (Tuesday’s 9 pm ET, 8 pm CT).

We now have photographic proof that Tom Ricketts and Ted Cruz are different people

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A lot of people think they have a double walking around someplace on Earth. They may actually be right. We have an example of this in baseball and politics.

Cubs owner Tom Ricketts looks a lot like Texas senator Ted Cruz. Or, since Ricketts is older, I guess Cruz looks like Ricketts. Either way, they could play brothers if someone put on, like, the worst ever production of some play about brothers.

If you’re not familiar with one or both of those guys, take a gander at the photo that was taken of the two of them in Washington this morning as the Cubs made the rounds with their World Series trophy:

If they put those rings together, Tom can turn into any animal and Ted can turn into anything made out of water. True story.

 

Anthony Rizzo calls out Miguel Montero for calling out Jake Arreita

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The morning we posted about Miguel Montero calling out his pitcher, Jake Arrieta, for allowing the Nationals to steal seven bases last night. Our view, of course, was that (a) it wasn’t all Arrieta’s fault; and (b) even if it was, publicly calling out your teammates like that is probably not a great idea and certainly isn’t a good look.

When I saw Montero’s comments I assumed that they would not play well in the Cubs’ clubhouse. I was right about that. Anthony Rizzo appeared on ESPN 1000 in Chicago this morning and had this to say:

Referring to Willson Contreras, of course, who has allowed 31 stolen bases to opponents while behind the dish. Coincidentally, Montero has allowed 31 stolen bases when he has played as well. Contreras has played in 24 more games than Montero, by the way.

I predict that, by around 3pm when the clubhouses open, we’ll see a public apology by Montero.