The Royals 2014 marketing slogan: “Be Royal”

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Lots of teams come up with marketing slogans — we highlighted the Dodgers’ rather curious effort the other day — but the Royals are the ones I always notice.

In 2012 the Royals used “Our Time” as its slogan. Last year it was “Come to play.”  This year? “Be Royal.” Which seems like quite a rebuke to Lorde. And a surprising one at that given that she was allegedly inspired by George freakin’ Brett to write that song to begin with. And it’s so broad, too. Should I be Lorenzo Cain or Billy Butler? There’s a lot of ground to cover there.

But the best take on marketing slogan, particularly Royals slogans, comes from Sam Mellinger of the KC Star. He ponders the utility of them to begin with, noting that all of the marketing slogans in the world don’t put as many butts in seats as fireworks night or a free t-shirt giveaway. And he notes the particular conundrum marketing departments have when it comes to promising baseball results in their slogan. If you go with “In it to win it!” and you start out 12-25, well, the slogan becomes obsolete and a big fat target pretty quickly.

Teams either win or lose. They are either exciting or they’re not. That’s what determines how many people show up. And if the team is good enough, the slogans will follow the team, not the other way around.

Mark Buehrle had “definitely no more than three” beers before saving Game 3 of the ’05 World Series

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David Ortiz is not the only Sox player who will see his number retired this week. In Chicago, retired White Sox starter Mark Buehrle will have his 56 retired as well.

He definitely earned it. He won 161 games in 12 seasons with the White Sox, defining what it meant to be a workhorse starter in the 21st century, tossing 200+ innings in every full season he pitched on the South Side. And, of course, he helped lead the White Sox to a World Series victory in 2005, starting the Chisox’ Game 2 victory, tossing seven innings.

He also got a save in that series. That came in Game 3, which went 14 innings, thus necessitating Buehrle’s services after Ozzie Guillen went through eight other pitchers. Buehrle only had to toss three pitches in a third of an inning to get that save, but he got it.

And, as he writes in The Players’ Tribune today, he did it with a slight handicap:

The thing a lot of people talk about with that one is this rumor that I drank a few beers before I got the save in our Game 3 victory.

There’s been some stuff that’s come out on that topic, but I feel like you all should really hear it straight from the horse’s mouth. So, here goes….

In short: Yeah, sure, O.K. fine, so I had a few. I can admit to that.

But you gotta let me explain.

He explains that he didn’t think he’d be pitching that night, which was a fair guess at the time. And that he got his drinking done pretty early, checking in with the coaches a lot. So, fine. But how many beers did he have?

And it was just like one or two beers . . .

. . . It was only like three beers….

Max.

Definitely no more than three, though.

I swear.

Mmhmm.

All of this, of course, makes one think about the whole Chicken and Beer incident in Boston. And how that became so overblown that it cost people their jobs and stuff. The only difference there is that (a) the guys drinking the beer were in no way coming into any games; and (b) the Red Sox lost. Change (b) and Josh Beckett and company become legends.

Anyway, congratulations on your honor, Mark. You earned it. Have a beer on us.

Red Sox claim Doug Fister off waivers

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SB Nation’s Chris Cotillo reports that the Red Sox claimed Doug Fister off release waivers from the Angels.

Fister, 33, opted out of his contract with the Angels the other day after posting allowing seven runs on 16 hits with five walks and 10 strikeouts in 15.2 innings at Triple-A Salt Lake City. He was presumably told that he would not be making it to the big club any time soon. With Boston’s pitching injuries, specifically to Eduardo Rodriguez, he may have a better shot of pitching in the majors for the Red Sox.