The Cardinals and Daniel Descalso avoid arbitration with a one-year deal

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People paying attention to the Super Bowl when there’s big news like this from baseball:

 

Descalso requested $1.65 million and the Cards offered $930,000.

There. I’ve sunk to a “utility infielder avoids arbitration” post. Are you happy, world? The offseason has officially hit its nadir.

Now: back to working on my action movie script in which Chipper Jones saves America after the evil General Bonesteel tries to kidnap the president. I think I’ll call it “Chipper Jones: Bonesteel.” I don’t have the plot worked out completely yet, but his secret weapon is his Yicketty Stick on which he goes Mammo on his enemies. And when he needs to get out of a tight spot fast, he summons his helicopter by barking “Chopper to Chipper!” into a two-way radio.

I figure it’ll make, like, a billion dollars once you figure in international box office.

Report: Twins interested in Wade Miley

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Free agent left-hander Wade Miley is among several offseason targets for the Twins, according to a report from Darren Wolfson of KSTP. Miley’s $12 million option was declined by the Orioles back in November, and while he’s expected to attract another major league deal in 2018, he hasn’t exactly been highly sought after this offseason.

The 31-year-old lefty finished his second campaign with the Orioles in 2017, producing an 8-15 record in 32 starts and ranking second-to-last among all AL starters with a 5.61 ERA, 5.3 BB/9 and 8.1 SO/9 in 157 1/3 innings. Even taking Miley’s undeniable durability into account — he remained healthy for the bulk of the season and completed his sixth straight year with 30+ starts — his declining value and career-worst numbers may lower his price tag as the 2018 season approaches.

Wolfson notes that the Twins have engaged in “regular dialogue” with Miley’s agent this winter, but he’s far from the only starting pitcher they have their eye on. Right-handers Yu Darvish, Lance Lynn, Alex Cobb and Chris Tillman are still on their radar, among several others, and club owner Jim Pohlad said Saturday that he was “totally on board” with the idea of signing a big-name free agent like Darvish or another available starter. “There are some interesting names and some interesting opportunities there,” Pohlad told a crowd at TwinsFest. “I’m as intrigued by it as anybody and attracted to it as anybody.”