New York Yankees' Wells hits two-run home run against Kansas City Royals in their MLB American League baseball game in Kansas City

The Phillies have shown interest in Vernon Wells

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Sometimes the jokes just write themselves. According to Nick Cafardo of the Boston Globe, the Phillies have recently expressed interest in current free agent outfielder Vernon Wells. Wells was released by the Yankees last week and the Angels are paying the majority of his $21 million salary for 2014, so acquiring Wells is as cheap and risk-free as it can get.

Wells just turned 35 and hasn’t been an above-average regular since 2010, his last year with the Blue Jays. Since then, his offense has all but disappeared, dropping from an .847 OPS in 2010 to a career-low .631 last season. His defense and base running, which used to be assets, have become hindrances to his value.

That being said, Wells can still be a useful platoon or a bench bat. Wells posted an OPS near .700 against lefties and he has historically hit lefties even better than that. The Phillies already have two right-handed hitters, who should be used in a platoon situation but won’t be, in John Mayberry and Darin Ruf, but another team may be able to find a spot for Wells.

Red Sox could go to arbitration hearing with Fernando Abad

BOSTON, MA - SEPTEMBER 16:  Fernando Abad #58 of the Boston Red Sox pitches against the New York Yankees during the ninth inning at Fenway Park on September 16, 2016 in Boston, Massachusetts.  (Photo by Maddie Meyer/Getty Images)
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The Red Sox are expecting to go to an arbitration hearing with left-handed reliever Fernando Abad, per Pete Abraham of the Boston Globe. Red Sox president Dave Dombrowski said there was a “decent chance” a hearing would be necessary after countering Abad’s $2.7 million request with $2 million.

Abad, 31, pitched just 12 2/3 innings for Boston after the club acquired him from Minnesota at the trade deadline last season. The lefty earned a cumulative 3.66 ERA, 4.2 BB/9 and 7.9 SO/9 for the two teams in 2016. He received $1.25 million in 2016 and will remain under club control (through arbitration) in 2017. A $2.7 million salary would be a hefty increase for the veteran reliever, who has seen a significant decline since he put up a 1.57 ERA for the Athletics in 2014 and who has not amassed more than 0.6 fWAR in any single season to date.

While the Red Sox aren’t close to settling with Abad, Evan Drellich of the Boston Herald reports that they may be closing in on a settlement with left-handed starter Drew Pomeranz. Pomeranz filed at $5.7 million, while the Sox felt more comfortable at $3.6 million. The two are expected to meet somewhere in the middle to avoid an arbitration hearing later this winter.

Report: Braves sign Kurt Suzuki

KANSAS CITY, MO - AUGUST 20: Kurt Suzuki #8 of the Minnesota Twins hits against the Kansas City Royals at Kauffman Stadium on August 20, 2016 in Kansas City, Missouri. (Photo by Ed Zurga/Getty Images)
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The Braves reportedly have a deal in place with free agent catcher Kurt Suzuki, per Chris Cotillo of SB Nation. FOX Sports’ Ken Rosenthal adds that the contract is for one year, $1.5 million with up to $2.5 million in additional incentives.

Suzuki, 33, completed a three-year track with the Twins in 2016, slashing .258/.301/.403 with eight home runs in 373 PA. The veteran backstop likely won’t provide an offensive or defensive upgrade over current starter Tyler Flowers, but should give the Braves some depth at a position they’ve been looking to strengthen since the start of the offseason.

The team has yet to confirm the deal.