Aubrey Huff has officially retired from Major League Baseball

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Aubrey Huff has officially announced his retirement from baseball, ending a 13-year Major League career, reports Chris Cotillo of MLB Daily Dish.

“I’m officially done. I have no desire to play anymore,” Huff said over the phone on Saturday. “That has come and gone. I couldn’t even imagine picking up a bat and trying to get ready for the whole grind of a baseball season anymore. I’m enjoying this way too much, just hanging out.”

Huff already has a new job lined up, as he will be a broadcaster with the Pac-12 network starting next month.

Huff was drafted by the Devil Rays in the fifth round of the 1998 draft and spent seven seasons in the big leagues with them. Over the rest of his career, he would play with the Astros, Orioles, Tigers, and Giants. He was a big part of the 2010 World Series champion Giants, posting an .891 OPS during the regular season with a few multi-hit games during the post-season. Perhaps his most important contribution to that team, though, was the inception of the “red rally thong“. He won a second ring as part of the 2012 Giants as well, but his role and contributions were reduced, as he was 35 years old.

The Braves will be serving some insane food this season

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Lots of teams have crazy concession items and lots of them will circulate photos of the more gonzo ones in the coming week leading up to the baseball season. The Braves, however, have been one of the more aggressive players in the gimmick concession item game in recent years, and they just sent around a release talking about some of the stuff they, and their concessionaire, Delaware North, will be serving at their new ballpark, Sun Trust Park, in 2017.

Among them:a blackened catfish po boy, which is a blackened 6-ounce filet of catfish cut up among three tacos, with a cajun remoulade. Some BBQ beef brisket sliders. A double burger. An ice cream bar. They’re also going to have a regionally-inspired thing called “The Taste of Braves Country,” showcasing southern cooking from Georgia, South Carolina, North Carolina, Tennessee, Mississippi and Alabama. Which they’re calling “Braves Country.” Accurate enough, I guess, even if some of us are old enough to remember when they aspired to be a national team. Alas.

The big item, though, is this one:

It’s called the “Tomahawk Chop” sandwich. It’s a fried pork chop with collard green slaw and white BBQ sauce. It serves four and costs $26. I’m guessing it tastes fantastic, but I think the name is pretty cringeworthy for the same reason the cheer which gives it its name is. And, given the dynamics of the Braves move to their new stadium, the choice of BBQ sauce is . . . amusing? I dunno.

Anyway, enjoy, Braves fans.

Max Scherzer will not be ready for Opening Day

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Ten days ago Nationals ace Max Scherzer said he’d be ready for the start of the regular season. “I’m gonna do it,” Scherzer said.

[Ron Howard from “Arrested Development” voice] — No, he’s not:

Nationals manager Dusty Baker said that Max Scherzer is not on track to be the team’s opening day starter, and will most likely open the season as the third pitcher in the rotation.

He’s still projected to make it to the opening rotation, taking the hill, most likely, on Thursday April 6 against the Marlins. At least if the schedule doesn’t slip any more.

Scherzer, as you probably know, has a stress fracture in the knuckle of his right ring finger, which has messed with his preparation and has caused him to alter his grip a bit. As of now Stephen Strasburg will get the Opening Day nod.