We could’ve had a movie called “Go to Hell, Mike Piazza”

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Ben Stiller is kinda vexing. Sometimes he’s pretty great (see, “The Ben Stiller Show,” “Zero Effect,” “Royal Tenenbaums”) sometimes he’s pretty insufferable (see, “Most Everything Else He’s Done”).  I can’t decide how this one woulda played out on that continuum, but I think I would’ve at least gone and seen it.

The movie: a script from the early 2000s in which Stiller played a character with a longstanding personal vendetta against Mike Piazza. Who would’ve played himself in the movie:

The draft of the script I have opens on superstar catcher Mike Piazza playing a game for the New York Mets in 1998 when a naked guy runs onto the field. With the words “Piazza sucks” painted across his chest and “Piazza can kiss my ass” on his back (with an arrow downward, of course), the naked guy screams at Piazza as he kicks dirt at him and avoids security while the crowd cheers him on. We freeze frame and hear a voiceover: “Wait, maybe I should start from the beginning…”

An entire plot summary is at the link. Complete with Tommy Lasorda cameo.

Obviously Piazza and Stiller are now too old to do this — it requires a current major leaguer — but I sorta feel like this one can and should be done with someone else.

Bryce Harper: call your agent.

Giancarlo Stanton will defend his Home Run Derby title

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The Marlins announced on Sunday that outfielder Giancarlo Stanton will defend his Home Run Derby title when the city of Miami host’s the All-Star Game festivities next month.

Stanton, 27, defeated Todd Frazier in the finals of last year’s Home Run Derby at Petco Park, hitting 20 home runs to Frazier’s 13. Stanton hit a total of 61 home runs in the Derby. This will be the third Home Run Derby in which Stanton has participated.

Stanton also went 1-for-3 with a solo home run to help the Marlins defeat the Cubs 4-2 on Sunday. He’s now batting .274/.357/.551 with 20 home runs and 49 RBI in 311 plate appearances.

Aaron Hicks to go on the disabled list with an oblique injury

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Yankees outfielder Aaron Hicks left Sunday’s game against the Rangers after four innings due to soreness in his right oblique. After the game, Hicks said he expects to go on the 10-day disabled list and miss the next three to four weeks, MLB.com’s Bryan Hoch reports.

Hicks was 1-for-2 with a single before departing on Sunday. He entered the game batting .288/.397/.515 with 10 home runs and 37 RBI in 198 plate appearances. It is by far the best season of his career.

Jacoby Ellsbury is on his way back from a concussion, so the Yankees will only have to bridge the gap in center field for a week or two. Mason Williams could draw some starts in center field in the meantime.